Friday, February 2, 2007

The Visit Continues

After our successful experience of looking at the books and some reading with “D” we decided to get out some of the things we brought for him (now that he was no longer crying). We gave him a small lego car to build. “D” told us that he loved legos, and he loved to build with them. He also loved to draw and liked to be creative. We told him that we had a son, Remington, who also LOVED legos. In fact, I think we have so many legos, that we could probably build a guest room!! HA! Remmy also loves to draw! He finished building the little car, and then when on to coloring and drawing on some drawing paper. As he was drawing, Ludmila, the caregiver from the boarding school was talking to him in a soft, drawn out voice (it sounded like “Mother-eze”, if you know what that is). She said to him…”In America you can have a family…….and live with your brothers…….and have your own toys………and have a Mama…..and a Papa……and you will get your own box of crayons……and you will not have to share with all of the other children, they will belong to you. We then told him that we had pictures of our home, and of our dogs, and Remmy and Tavia, and would he like to see them? He said “Nyet” (No). Ludmilla said we should give him more time, and we will talk about it again tomorrow. We agreed. Then “D” said that he would like to see a picture of our car, though. Well!! Of course!! I did not have that, however. We got out a color book that had all of these pages that were 1). Find the matching picture, or 2.) Find the picture that is different, or 3). trace through the maze. I purchased this coloring book because I thought these were things we would be able to do together without knowing the language. It worked!! He got them right! He was even faster than I was!! I had to stop and think a minute in order to check his work, to make sure he made the right choice!! He is a very bright child! I was very pleased with his demonstration of prolonged concentration. Up until this time, he had been fearful that Ludmila would leave, and he would be alone with us and the facilitator. He clearly was feeling more at ease with us. We continued to play together on the floor, and Ludmila got up and quietly left……only for about 15 or 20 minutes, but non the less, it was a first step in “D” building trust with us. Ludmila returned shortly, and it was time for them to return to the local orphanage in town. Wayne and I both hugged “D” goodbye and told him “ ah ZAF-tra (until tomorrow).

6 comments:

Sybil Guetersloh said...

I am following your blog as we are the parents of a Russian daughter who was adopted at 5 1/2 years old. Have you thought of outright telling D that you do not beat your children and would never do that to any of your children - that you don't believe in doing that. Can you do something like give him Papa's gloves and tell him you trust him with them and would like if he can begin to trust you never to hurt him. Just a thought and I know it is a process but something concrete is good for a child to build from.

Elle said...

I love how this story is going.

Melissa said...

Sounds better each day.

Cathy said...

Susan: It is so wonderful to read about the boys. Having been there re bio and adopted kids, I can already see that Tav will be little "A"'s champion while Rem and "D" will link up as best buds in crime! Makes me smile.....
Cathy

Nancy said...

I must check here twice a day so that I can see next installment immidiately! I can't wait to hear the rest.

kate said...

I'm so enjoying following your progress!