Court Update

For those of you who are interested, or who care.....about a year ago I posted an update on a custody situation we currently had in the American Courts over my two teenagers (who are now currently 15 and 16 - who are "way old enough" to decide where they want to live), but "some people" do not listen, nor do they see what is best for the child. At any rate, our court date was post-poned to last April 14th, 2009...with a recent update last July 6, 2009....and although I was given full custody (verbal)of the teenage children....we still have not seen the signed decree!! What custody case could take almost 3 years?? I mean, really, at age 15 and 16...it is really a "moot point" don't you think? This is why I dislike the American Court system so much, besides the point that both of my ex-husbands were awarded custody and I had to pay the child support....because I was an educated woman and earned a good living!! I am sure the Judicial system has made some good decisions for someone somewhere, but not for me!! It was only until my children did poorly with their fathers that the tables were turned!! This is why I refused to adopt from within the United States, because I knew as soon as we bonded and made a foster child a family member, the court system would turn around and take them from a loving family only to be returned to an abusive one. I just could not do that to my own children. So...we decided to look for children who already did not have parents. We started out to adopt one child, and we found brothers that were 6 years apart in age (2 and 8 years). I worried something would go wrong in Russia when we had court, because I have heard horror stories of other families where their adoption did not go through, and I have been so unlucky in legal matters (My Mother always told me Saturn was not my friend....or something like that). Happily, all went well in Russia, and I hope the odds will come around and all well go well here in the States. I will keep those of you who care to know informed when I have the signed formal papers. I hope it is soon. How much can teenagers endure?? Apparently....a lot!!

More on Motherhood

Yes, being a Mother is an amazing experience!! However, with the joys also comes the heartaches!! Sometimes I wish I could take away the trials and pain that come into the lives of my children. Sometimes life is hard.....and very, very harsh. No one knows this better than my own children. My older children have suffered through divorce and physical separation. My younger children have suffered through abandonment and physical pain. Both sets have experienced emotional pain. At times I wish I could make all their choices for them, so they would make good decisions. But choice and accountability are important lessons to learn. Pain and experience comes from making poor choices, and experience comes from making good choices. One of the hardest things I have ever had to do as a Mother is to sit back, and let my children make choices. They have learned there are consequences to their actions. This has been an invaluable lesson.....and a hard one for me as well.

The Joy of Motherhood

I often think what a wonderful privilege it is to be a Mom. Yes, it is a lot of work, but the rewards are amazing. I love seeing my children grow. I love seeing them happy. Sasha is now 4 years old and Kylen is 10. Overall, they are both very well-adjusted children. We are so blessed to have them. I have been working quite a few night shifts at the hospital, so I have either been sleeping in the morning when my husband takes Sasha to daycare, or I have not been home. Of course, I have been spending time with him in the afternoons and early evenings, but I have not been home the last several mornings. Yesterday I was home in the morning, and he woke up and ran into my room. He heard me puttering around in our bathroom, which adjoins the bedroom. As soon as he saw it was me, he flung his arms open wide and ran right into my legs, squeezing me so tightly!! He had the biggest smile on his face!! It was so rewarding to see the brightness in his eyes!! I remember when we first brought him home from Russia. He had such a dull look in his eyes. There was no life and excitement there. That is the difference that love and bonding makes. Everyone needs a sense of love and belonging. It is essential to the progression of maturity and development. Without love and belonging......there is only existing. What a privilege and pleasure it is to have these boys belong to me....and to give them the love that only a Mother can give!!