The Meeting!!!

The time had come to meet our youngest referral, little A. Wayne and I were sitting on the couch in the large, living area of his groupa. Besides a couch, there was a small table and some chairs (toddler size), an umbrella stroller with a doll (kookla) in it, a small plastic climbing gym with slide, and a couple of see-saw toys. We waited on the couch for A. to enter. The representative from the Guardianship department, Svetlana L. was sitting in a chair across from where we sat. She was observing us. Suddenly, I heard the caregivers speaking in Russian to little A. (I have learned some words and phrases, and it is easier to understand what is being said in Russian, than to speak it, at least for me…. as my mind does not seem to work that fast!!). The caregivers were saying to him, “Come in here, your Mama and Papa are here”. “Your Papa and Mama have come to see you.” “Come see your Mama and Papa!!”. We were so nervous waiting for him to come around the corner to where we were seated. As the voices got closer and closer, I was feeling more and more anxious, wondering what I would see with that first glimpse. Would he be normal? Would he look like his picture? (I hoped not…..he had some questionable characteristics in the picture, but then, it is hard to determine overall health status from a small picture). Would he be hyperactive and lack focus and concentration?? Just then, he walked around the corner and came to stand in front of us. He was still holding the care givers hand. She picked up his hand and started rubbing it on Wayne’s leg and said “A. etta tvoy Papa” (A. this is your Papa), and then the same with me, stroking my arm “ Etta tvai- YA Mama” (this is your Mama). The look on his face was one I will never forget. It was one of wonderment!! He looked almost as if to say “Papa?? Mama?? Where in the world have you been???” He looked adorable!! He was a little on the small side, but was well proportioned. He had such fair skin, and pink rosy cheeks, with blue eyes and medium blonde hair. I pulled him up in my lap and spoke with him. He looked intently into my eyes. I reached down into my bag and pulled out a couple of toys we had brought for him. One was a little blue elephant (sloan) with activity beads and such on it, and the other was a kitty puppet. As I started to squeak the sloan (elephant) his face puckered up as if he was going to cry!! I quickly put that to the side and tried the kitty puppet! It seems he was afraid of that, too! The children are very limited in what toys they are exposed to there in the orphanage. I think he just had never seen toys like that before. I reached into my bag again and pulled out several cardboard books, with pictures, colors, animals, etc. I also pulled out some of the snacks and juice (sok). He sat in my lap for over 30 minutes while we “read” stories. He loved looking at the books, and enjoyed pointing to all of the pictures. I then passed him over to Wayne’s lap. He took one look at Wayne and started to cry. His chief caretaker, Angelina, had entered the room by that point. She explained that the children in the Baby home never see any men, so most of them are afraid of men. We quickly distracted little A. with the books again, and immediately he was fine. I also pulled out a blanket we had brought for him to hold while we read. He allowed Wayne to hold him for the rest of the visit. I was shocked by his manner of concentration and focus on the books. He sat very still and paid very close attention. Angelina told me that he loved books and loved to be read to!! So much for the hyperactivity thing and not being able to sit still to concentrate!! Angelina then announced loudly to Svetlana of the Guardianship dept. that she had absolutely NO reservations about of as his parents, whatsoever. She said she could tell by all the thoughtful things we had brought him, along with our interaction with him that we would be very good parents for him. That made us feel really good that she said that in front of Svetlana. Angelina then called to little A. and had him get down from our laps. She said in Russian…”Let me show you what he can do”. She then proceeded to give him instructions of things to do, and he followed them all precisely!! She asked him to slide down the slide, run around the room, kick the ball, etc. She was calling to him, and he was laughing, and giggling and running away. He was really having fun!! She asked little A. to push the doll in the stroller, He went running around -the room with it and then slammed it into the wall! Then she said “ Di–tee kookla chai” (Give the doll some tea). He immediately ran over to the table, picked up a little cup and then ran back and then held the cup up to the kookla’s (doll’s) mouth, so she could drink!! I am thinking……WOW!! Angelina then asks him to be nice to the kookla, and he then starts stroking her hair and petting the doll!! Of course, Wayne is still a little bit in the dark, and not exactly understanding what is happening, as he does not understand Russian yet. I thought about what had just happened. I was SO impressed!! All of the concerns I had about his supposed “hyperactivity” and his “inability to concentrate and focus” had all disappeared, and now I was seeing him “in action” at full speed, and not only comprehending what was asked of him, but actually doing it!! I felt so relieved!! I had not even had the opportunity to visit with the doctors yet regarding his medical condition, but after seeing him and evaluating him in person, I knew he would be absolutely fine!! He is a perfectly normal little boy, who just had very unfortunate circumstances. He only has a few institutional delays…..and this we can handle!!