Our Forever Family

Court Update

2009-08-08T20:56:00.003-04:00

For those of you who are interested, or who care.....about a year ago I posted an update on a custody situation we currently had in the American Courts over my two teenagers (who are now currently 15 and 16 - who are "way old enough" to decide where they want to live), but "some people" do not listen, nor do they see what is best for the child. At any rate, our court date was post-poned to last April 14th, 2009...with a recent update last July 6, 2009....and although I was given full custody (verbal)of the teenage children....we still have not seen the signed decree!! What custody case could take almost 3 years?? I mean, really, at age 15 and 16...it is really a "moot point" don't you think? This is why I dislike the American Court system so much, besides the point that both of my ex-husbands were awarded custody and I had to pay the child support....because I was an educated woman and earned a good living!! I am sure the Judicial system has made some good decisions for someone somewhere, but not for me!! It was only until my children did poorly with their fathers that the tables were turned!! This is why I refused to adopt from within the United States, because I knew as soon as we bonded and made a foster child a family member, the court system would turn around and take them from a loving family only to be returned to an abusive one. I just could not do that to my own children. So...we decided to look for children who already did not have parents. We started out to adopt one child, and we found brothers that were 6 years apart in age (2 and 8 years). I worried something would go wrong in Russia when we had court, because I have heard horror stories of other families where their adoption did not go through, and I have been so unlucky in legal matters (My Mother always told me Saturn was not my friend....or something like that). Happily, all went well in Russia, and I hope the odds will come around and all well go well here in the States. I will keep those of you who care to know informed when I have the signed formal papers. I hope it is soon. How much can teenagers endure?? Apparently....a lot!!

More on Motherhood

2009-08-06T20:33:00.002-04:00

Yes, being a Mother is an amazing experience!! However, with the joys also comes the heartaches!! Sometimes I wish I could take away the trials and pain that come into the lives of my children. Sometimes life is hard.....and very, very harsh. No one knows this better than my own children. My older children have suffered through divorce and physical separation. My younger children have suffered through abandonment and physical pain. Both sets have experienced emotional pain. At times I wish I could make all their choices for them, so they would make good decisions. But choice and accountability are important lessons to learn. Pain and experience comes from making poor choices, and experience comes from making good choices. One of the hardest things I have ever had to do as a Mother is to sit back, and let my children make choices. They have learned there are consequences to their actions. This has been an invaluable lesson.....and a hard one for me as well.

The Joy of Motherhood

2009-08-04T20:10:00.001-04:00

I often think what a wonderful privilege it is to be a Mom. Yes, it is a lot of work, but the rewards are amazing. I love seeing my children grow. I love seeing them happy. Sasha is now 4 years old and Kylen is 10. Overall, they are both very well-adjusted children. We are so blessed to have them. I have been working quite a few night shifts at the hospital, so I have either been sleeping in the morning when my husband takes Sasha to daycare, or I have not been home. Of course, I have been spending time with him in the afternoons and early evenings, but I have not been home the last several mornings. Yesterday I was home in the morning, and he woke up and ran into my room. He heard me puttering around in our bathroom, which adjoins the bedroom. As soon as he saw it was me, he flung his arms open wide and ran right into my legs, squeezing me so tightly!! He had the biggest smile on his face!! It was so rewarding to see the brightness in his eyes!! I remember when we first brought him home from Russia. He had such a dull look in his eyes. There was no life and excitement there. That is the difference that love and bonding makes. Everyone needs a sense of love and belonging. It is essential to the progression of maturity and development. Without love and belonging......there is only existing. What a privilege and pleasure it is to have these boys belong to me....and to give them the love that only a Mother can give!!

Back to School !!

2008-09-18T15:22:00.003-04:00

Kylen started the 3rd grade this year. He has a wonderful teacher and is making some progress in reading. Sasha (Alexander) moved up to preschool two days a week. I have been thinking of putting him in an extra day or two, for the mornings only. He is so behind developmentally. This November he will turn 4 years old, but developmentally he is between 19 and 22 months old. He is very behind on language and has only now started to talk. Yesterday we were sharing a plum and he gave me a bite. Well, I must have touched his finger with my teeth, and he thought I was biting him, and he said "Say 'Sorry Sasha!!' "!! I guess I am always saying to him when he is too rough or acting out "Say you are sorry, Sasha". HA!! At any rate, I have struggled with trying to decide if he should have more classtime or more "mommytime". Our bonding and attachment has gone very well with Sasha ( and we still have a long way to go with Kylen....more on that later). However for now, I have decided that Sasha will benefit most from "mommytime". He already has some days that he must spend away from me because I work. I really feel he will benefit most from more love, nurturing and closeness to Mom. Time will tell.

Summer Revisited

2008-09-17T23:45:00.004-04:00

Why is it the summer goes by so quickly? We had such a fun and wonderful summer. We took 3 trips to the beach. Sasha LOVED the ocean, waves and the sand. Kylen had learned about palm trees and coconut trees when he was in school at Magadan. He was so excited to see them in person!! Kylen was the best sand crab catcher EVER!! He even caught little sand crabs for the other little kids that weren't fast enough to catch them!! He has become a great little swimmer, too!! He is greatly improved from the second month of coming home from Russia and when we went to the waterpark near my Mom's house! We had only been home from Russia two months, and Kylen wasn't speaking English yet, but somehow I let him convince me that he could swim. So, I gave him permission to go down this big slide into what I call "the toilet bowl" with Tavia and Remmy. Well, it is this huge slide that at the bottom, you swirl around and around (like when the toilet flushes) and then you land in the water. As soon as Kylen hit the water the lifeguard blew the whistle and the they jumped in to pull him out. I raised my hand and said... "Yes, I am the stupid parent that let him slide down!" He wasn't afraid, and within a few weeks he was swimming like a fish!! Now he tubes behind our boat like a Mad Man!! But I look back on those early days and some of the crazy things that happened make us laugh!!

Fantastic Summer !!

2008-08-07T23:19:00.001-04:00

We have enjoyed such a fun summer!! Having a Court Date last May that involved my two older children and my ex finished and behind us was a HUGE relief. This has been pending for almost two years, and again there was another successful postponement on the part of my ex until the end of September......but we are almost there and positive things are happening for our side. More on that later.....but needless to say it has been a HUGE stressor for all of the children, as well as my husband and myself to be going through such a tremendous ordeal. We are so happy to see the light at the end of the tunnel!! Kylen and Alexander (Sasha) are such a tremendous blessing to us!! They are happy boys and are doing so well!! We still have some issues we are dealing with.....and I hope to talk about some of these issues in order to help some of you with your challenges. I have just been so "zapped" dealing with all this legal stuff, that I didn't seem to have much reserve left to discuss other aspects of my life. It really has been all-consuming. I am so happy it is almost over....and will be even happier for a positive outcome!! Think positive thoughts for us and say a few prayers, please!! I am learning more about bonding as we go along and this is also something I want to share in future posts!! I have new pictures coming too!! I am glad to be back with all my blogger friends!! I have missed you all!!

WOW !! THE ONE YEAR POST-PLACEMENT REPORT !!

2008-02-28T22:38:00.002-05:00

Wow!! How time flys!! Today Sasha and I drove 6 hours (to and fro) to "The Big City" to get our one year post-placement reports apostilled and off to FedEx to our adoption agency to submit to Russia!! One year ago today we were frantically packing and getting ready to depart to pick up our children in Russia!! It all seems so surreal now that they are so integrated into our family!! Honestly, I cannot even picture our lives without them being here!! WOW!! Are we ever lucky!!

Still the Sweetest Boys Ever!!

2007-12-13T06:49:00.000-05:00

Our weather has stayed very warm until just recently. I wanted to share a sweet picture I took just before we went into our Sacrament Meeting at church. It was taken just a few weeks ago. Aren't they just adorable? I love Alexander in his "Southern Fancy Pants", and hope you Northerners will forgive me for dressing him this way. It is a true "Deep South" Southern tradition, and is ACTUALLY Remmy's outfit he wore 12 years ago when he was a baby!! WHAT am I doing with the same exact outfit my older son wore over a decade ago, you ask?? Well....unfortunately, I am a packrat......I told you I needed to clean my house!! I had better get crackin' !!!

Life is What Happens While We are Making Plans!!

2007-12-12T23:04:00.000-05:00

WOW!! Is life ever busy!! Between three children in three different schools, one baby still at home. a football player, a cheerleader (cheering for the football games...now for the basketball games...all 112 of them including the 9th grade, the JV and the Varsity), wrestling season (ugh! I hate it when they squeeze, smash, and get sweat all over my son!!), drama club and the two performances so far (Charlotte's Web and the Christmas Pageant), band concerts, band competition and travel performances, soccer season for Kylen (which, by the way....they call "foot ball in Russia),church activities, Boy Scouts, Cub Scouts, and....HOMEWORK!!....working for me (oh, and by the way I took a second job temporarily.....mainly because I was "temporarily insane", and shopping for food, and cooking, etc.etc.etc......OH! Did I forget to mention "cleaning the house"?? Well, that must be because it has NOT been done in a while!! HA!! Oh, I know....I have a day off from work tomorrow....THAT is what I can do in my spare time! I have had so many aspirations for this blog....and all of them have seem to have gone by the wayside......and lost in the flurry and hustle and bustle of everyday lifes schedule. I am hoping to make a resolution to blog because I really want to make a contribution that matters, and provide help for those who are seeking answers, and I know some of you are just plain curious as to how we are all doing. I am thinking now maybe I should just blog to save my own sanity!! Somewhere out there in the world, I have some interested readers.....or I wouldn't have over 10,000 readers looking at my blog!! So...as my Mother would say...."Come on Susan, Get it together!!"

Kitties, and Turtles, and Strawberries......OH MY!!

2007-09-26T01:48:00.000-04:00

Ok...I guess I need a little help in the organization department, because after writing all these nice notes on bonding and attachment, and setting them aside for a time when I could post them......I CAN'T FIND THEM!! So...I keep waiting and hoping they will turn up, and then I will discuss the topic.....but, tonight I said to myself "What if I never find the list, and I don't blog again for months??" So, I decided to throw in the towel and write on some other happenings, and as sure as I start to ignore my obsession (trying to locate the lost list)....I will find it!! Right?? Well, that is my new theory and I am sticking to it!! Yesterday when Sasha and I were leaving the house, there was a little box turtle on the cement walkway! This turtle was soon joined by the little kitty that adopted our family this past summer. (There was this kitten that showed up in the garage when we were keeping the puppies there in a little fenced enclosure in the garage). Oh, did I forget to say that in May we had 4 puppies that we sold (finally!!) and so this little kitty would sneak into the garage and curl up with the puppies and sleep with them. It was a wild kitty someone abandoned, but finally now after a couple of months it is finally warming up to us. So back to the turtle.....after waiting 10 minutes for him to pop out of his shell (He clamped down hard when Sasha picked him up and started waving him wildly in the air!!), we decided to get a plastic container and keep him (just for a few days) and then release him again. Sasha was so excited to have the turtle in the container! We gave the turtle a strawberry to eat, and Sasha was thrilled to see this little creature take bites out of the berry. What cute giggling sounds he made! It was such a refreshing sight to see a little boy have this new and fresh experience!

ONLINE AGAIN!!

2007-09-17T10:54:00.000-04:00

Whew!! I am so relieved to be back up and running again (in the abstract sense, of course)! I has some problems with blogger, and was unable to sign in to my account. After much toil and testing of my patience, I figured out the problem. Sorry about the delay.....so the next post will begin discussing our successful strategies for bonding and attachment. There are some differences for the different ages, as one might suspect. I hope you will find these useful, and find success as well for your bonding experience.

MY TOP TEN BONDING AND ATTACHMENT STRATEGIES

2007-08-30T12:50:00.000-04:00

During my "mission" to adopt, and during my information gathering stage on adoption, I read a lot of literature. This literature was not only from authorities on bonding, including developmental psychologists and their various theories, but also personal stories of other adoptive parents. Some of these stories did not have the happiest of endings, as some of these became disrupted adoptions (children returned.....or sent to another home). Some of these stories with unhappy endings do not progress to disruption, but the bonding didn't occur, and the children did not become attached to the parent/parents. I was very worried about this. Of course, I had my experience with my five biological children, which I am sure, gave me a little insight. However, this situation would be different. In addition to me being a perfect stranger to my newly adopted children, these new children had special needs. They were abused, abandoned, and an inate "self-preservation" mode had taken over. How could I get these children to trust again? This was my quest !! I am so happy to announce that both of my boys are totally attached to me. Little Alexander is "Mama's Baby", and Kylen constantly asks me when are my next days off from work, so I am home with him after school!! They run to me and squeeze me so hard when they see me! I am so happy that we have bonded and attached in this special way! So, I have decided to share my information and strategies with you, in hopes that some of these things may be successful for you as well. I am currently working on the two lists, with some differences, of the top ten strategies for bonding with a toddler, and with an older child. I will share the toddler list first, with the next posting. Oh, and P.S. Today is my BIRTHDAY!! What a wonderful present I have this year.....two sweet, adorable boys that both love to be around me, and love their new home in America!! We are blessed!!

FINALLY PLAYING TOGETHER !!

2007-08-26T23:50:00.000-04:00

What fun the boys are having!! When we first came home, they did not know how to play with each other! Kylen had not lived with his baby brother since the baby was 2 months old. He had been placed in an Orphanage boarding school for children age 6 to age 18. He knew how to play with older children, but not a baby or a toddler. Unless one has "grown up" with a baby or toddler in the family, one does not know how to interact with them, nor how to play. The same for Alexander. He was only used to the small toddlers in his groupa. The first week we had them home, they were like two children in the same room, but there was no interaction between them, nor was there really any interest. Not only were these brothers at different ages developmentally, but they were essentially "strangers" to one another!! They did not even know each other! Through the summer they have slowly progressed. Now they play together, and Kylen very often takes Alexander's hand and holds it in his own. These boys are so cute together, and they are finally having the brotherly companionship that was taken from them over two years ago!! What a joy to see them playing so happily together!!

MY TWO SUPERBOYS !!

2007-08-23T23:39:00.000-04:00

I am not sure if Kylen and Alexander really know who Superman is.....but they have certainly had fun wearing these P.J.'s and flying around the house with their capes flowing in the wind behind them!! They feel empowered and invincible!! They have a sense of belonging!! That is what families do for you!!

LIFE IS WHAT HAPPENS WHILE WE ARE MAKING PLANS !!

2007-08-22T23:54:00.000-04:00

Wow! What a fast and busy summer!! We have been enjoying the boys everyday and they are both doing so well!! I have had so many ideas about successes and failures that I have wanted to share with you concerning our adventures in bonding and attaching with the boys. I have vowed to post two blogs per week on Thursdays and on Sundays sharing helpful hints and suggestions that worked well for our situation. We truly are blessed to have these two beautiful boys, and have certainly had our share of "two steps forward, and one step back". I must say, however, even at the most difficult of times, the journey has been incredibly rewarding, and SOOOOOOOO worth it!! I hope you will continue to share this entertaining and exciting journey with us as we continue bonding with our new children!! Stay tuned for more!!

A Conversation With Kylen

2007-06-07T23:03:00.000-04:00

The following is an actual conversation that occurred about one hour after a feeding frenzy with watermelon. Kylen LOVED it and kept eating and eating and eating. Kylen: "Mama (pronounced Maaaaaa-mah.....said in a whine), Hungry!!! Me: "You are hungry?" Kylen: "Yes" Me: " How can you be hungry??? You just ate about one thousand pieces of watermelon!!" Kylen: "Maaaaaaa-mah, no.....not a thousand!!" Me: " Well, OK, not a thousand, but you ate a lot!! How many did you eat??" Kylen: "Ten, maybe." Me: "Dah, (Yes) that is how many you ate.....exactly ten pieces!!" Notice how I am the only one speaking Russian here!!

Kylen's First Day of School !!

2007-06-05T23:19:00.000-04:00

Since we arrived home from the Motherland (inserting a little humor here...ha!) we have been able to alternate our work schedules so that one of us is always at home with the boys. This has been working out very well for their attachment to us and it has also given us an opportunity to work on Kylen's English. He has made excellent progress (I'll tell you about a couple of conversations we had earlier this week......I'll try to write about them tomorrow), however, he had really started to be a little bit bored, especially now that Tavia and Remmy are off to various and sundry camps (church, cheer, boy scouts, football, etc.).....so......Kylen has been ESPECIALLY bored with them gone!! I found a little independent school using the Montesorri (wow....I guess if I am going to use it then I should learn how to spell it!!). At any rate, he went today and looked abit displaced as I left him there. I am happy to report that he thoroughly enjoyed his first day of school! He was quite happy and very social with all of the kids. It was truely a successful day!! He can hardly wait to get there tomorrow!! We are thrilled!!

UPDATE ! ! ! !

2007-06-04T23:24:00.000-04:00

OK......I am ashamed that I have not kept up with our blog for the last month and one half (give or take a week!!). Time has certainly gotten away from me!! Our life has been more than a little crazy with adjusting to new family members!! Of course, it has not been easy for the boys either!! The front door of our house reminds me of one of those big revolving, circular doors you find at the entrance to a fancy hotel!! Someone is always coming and going......and now one daughter is home from College for the summer, one daughter has moved back home in order to attend college, and one son was here for a short visit once his College semester was over. And.....the poor kids have not even met two of their siblings......an older brother and sister that live in Seattle, Washington!! I know this is a crazy life for them, and I keep waiting for Kylen and Alexander to hug and embrace the mail lady ( in rural Missouri we do not have a mailman...but a lady!) thinking she MUST be some family member, too!! The first thing I want to say is that if you survive the first month home with your newly adopted child/children (and YOU WILL), then you are going to make it!!! The first month was so hard....but I learned some tricks to the trade that made life SO MUCH easier, and I shall share them later!! We are in such a better place now than when we first arrived home, and we are all doing well.......more on that to come as well!! The next obstacle we have overcome that hindered our blogging ability was that dadblasted dial-up!! HOORAY!! We have high speed!! On that note and with our new found technology, I promise to post pictures later this week!! Stay tuned!! There are some really good stories to tell!!

FINALLY !!!

2007-04-17T23:40:00.000-04:00

Thanks to all of you who have prayed for Dawn and Joe. By way of update, their courtdate is postponed until the 19th...and the decision will be final. So....keep those prayers coming that they will be granted the adoption. The birthmother is only 17 and is 5 months pregnant again, with no job or place to live. She cannot possibly take care of one baby, much less two!! I apologize for my tardiness, but I also thank you all for the support you have shown us. We are so blessed to have our two boys. I got really bummed out last week. I was viewing our pictures of Russia and Moscow on the digital camera, as I was going to take them to the store and print off all the photos....plus Tavia is to give a presentation to all of the 8th grade history classes on Russia.......only the memory card had a "glitch" in it and now NONE of the pictures of Russia come up....(and no, I did not save or download it on my laptop previously!! DUH!!) WOW!! And I am somebody's doctor!! Scarey, huh? OK......so as I am whining and crying about my pictures being gone......I am reminded that we have our little boys at home with us. Many of you wonderful, loving people I have met over these adoption blogs, have lost referrals or had failed adoptions. I realized how lucky I was to have lost the pictures....but to have the boys here in our family. I know so many of you have pain and are trying to heal....because you have the pictures and memories, but not the child. I am so very, very grateful. Suddenly, my loss of some "pictures" in the overall scheme of things, was not so insurmountable!! OK.....so now you all know, I really am PollyAnna. Tomorrow night.......the final installment of our court date!!

Call for Prayer!!

2007-04-16T23:36:00.000-04:00

Hello Everyone!! We have had such a busy week! I promise to post tomorrow night. Right now I have an important prayer request!! Please pray for Joe and Dawn who have a court date on the 17th in Kazakstan. They are facing opposition from the birth Mother, who didn't wants her child to be raised in an orphanage rather than live with Americans. Please pray for them!!

Court - The Final Chaper -- Part II

2007-04-11T23:05:00.000-04:00

The next person to address the judge was Ludmila, the Director of the Orutukan Boarding School, where Kylen attended school. She told the Judge of our first meeting with Kylen. She told how he was very afraid and frightened. She stated that shortly after coming into the same room with us, he began crying and sobbing uncontrollably. She commented that she was quite surprised at his extreme emotional response. She stated she did not expect this. But, upon questioning Kylen, he stated that seeing us reminded him of the last time he was with his biological Mama and Papa, and that it was very painful for him. Ludmila explained to the Judge how I began to read to him and point to the pictures in the book, to get his mind off of being afraid. She stated that he slowly began to feel more comfortable with us. Then Ludmila began to tell the judge of the abuse that Kylen had endured. She told of when the parents used to get drunk and beat him. She told of the time that he ran away from the father, in the middle of winter, in minus 60 degree temperatures, when he was trying to get away from a beating. Kylen was probably around age 4 to 5. His father was drunk, and when he staggered just a minute, Kylen grabbed his coat, but could not find his boots. He had to flee quickly in order to escape his father’s grasp. He ran out into the snow and his feet sustained horrible frostbite damage. He was treated at a hospital for apparently, sometime. When we petitioned to adopt Kylen, he had to be taken back to the same hospital for a medical examination, required by Russian law. Ludmila stated that about 20 to 30 minutes away, as soon as Kylen realized he was going back to that hospital, he began to get sick, and began throwing up, due to remembering the trauma and stress of his frostbite episode. She then told the Judge that the next day we visited with Kylen, he was very comfortable with us, and told her that he wanted to go live in America with a family and live their with his brother. She told the Judge of the picture album we furnished him with that had pictures of all of our pets, and other children and of our home. Ludmila told the Judge that Kylen had every person and pet in the book memorized, and that he went around the school telling others that this was his Mama and Papa, and told the names of the cat and dogs, and that this was his new home. She stated how he was so happy to have a new home with parents, and that he was happy that he would be living in a home with his brother. Ludmila also stated that he had memorized the names of all of the people and animals in the photo album we had given him. She said he had told all of the children and teachers at the boarding school all about his new family in America and the names of his new dogs and the name of his cat. She told the Judge that she felt very positive about Kylen (Denis) being adopted by us, She also told the Judge that again, no other family had stepped forward to adopt these boys. She again told the Judge that she felt this was a good thing for the boys and that we would be very good parents for them. She stated she based this on the interaction she saw between us and Kylen. She also had observed us in the baby home with both Kylen and Sasha. She stated the way we related to the boys was very good. Then, she looked at me (instead of the Judge) and she told me that she hoped I would try very hard to keep Kylen Denis speaking his native language. She realized that he would need to concentrate on learning English, but she also wanted to preserve his heritage by having him remember about his culture and about his language. I felt the burden of finding a way to keep him reading, writing, and speaking Russian.

Court - The Final Chapter ...Part One

2007-04-10T23:45:00.000-04:00

The “Cast of the Court” , as they are called, now give their input. The Judge first began with Svetlana, the representative from the Guardianship Department. The Judge asked her how our first visit went with the children, and what she observed. Svetlana stated that at first Sasha was calm, and sat quietly next to us. She stated that he had a “calm nature” like Wayne had a calm nature ( I don’t know……that is just what she said!!). Then she stated that Sasha then got up from the couch with one of the caregivers and ran and played actively in the living room of the groupa. The representative told the judge that she observed us to be very attentive to Sasha, and that we brought things for him to play with, and little snacks for him to eat. She testified that the child seemed to be comfortable with us and warmed up very nicely to us. She said she observed our meeting together to be very positive and felt that we would be good parents to Sasha. She said she would recommend us to be Sasha’s new parents. She also stated that after all the time that Sasha and his brother had been on the Federal Data Bank, that no Russian families had stepped forward to adopt them, and even though the Guardianship Department had tried very hard to find the children parents, they were unable to find a family to adopt these two boys. She told the Judge that she was in favor of us adopting these boys. The next person to address the Court was the Chief Social Worker for the Baby Home. She stated to the judge how Sasha came to be taken away from his parents, and how he and his brother were placed in a Rehabilitation Home to give the parents an opportunity to be rehabilitated, in order to keep the custody of their children. She told the Judge that when Sasha was only 6 months old, and still in the Rehabilitation Home, that a Russian family saw him, and wanted to adopt him. However, he was not eligible for adoption at that point in time, as the parental rights were not terminated as of yet. The family decided they did not want to wait until he was eligible for adoption. She again stated the point that now that the children are eligible for adoption, and were registered with the data bank, no other families have come forward to express interest in either or both of these two children. The Chief Social worker told the Judge that she felt this was possibly the only chance for Sasha and his brother to be adopted together.

My Second Question

2007-04-08T23:03:00.000-04:00

The Judge asked me if I had anything else to add to what my husband had said. I took this opportunity to become the “clean-up hitter”!! I stated again how important family was to us. I told the Judge how much we enjoyed our children now at home, and that we were still very close to them even though they are working jobs or attending college. I also said that keeping Kylen in touch with his Russian heritage was also important to us. I told the Judge that about 2 to 3 hours away from our home was a Russian Center (located in St. Louis). It is actually a museum called the Children’s Worldways Museum. Inside the building is divided into sections for children adopted from Russia, China, Guatamala and South America, Phillipines, and Korea, etc. Each month they hold a special program focusing in on the culture of these countries. It is a fantastic opportunity for the kids to learn all about where they come from. I explained that I planned on utilizing this so that Kylen would continue to learn about Russia. The museum is also managed by a Russian woman. I have met with this woman previously, and she has stated she would help us with our son, and also help him retain his native Russian language. I again emphasized all the positive resources available to us to use with Kylen, and how we were so looking forward to being able to utilize these resources to help him continue with his language skills

My Turn in Court

2007-04-07T23:31:00.000-04:00

Wayne had just explained why we wanted to adopt more children, and how he would handle boys differently than girls, since he had two biological children that were girls. He was also asked what type of special tutoring we would provide for Kylen to help him learn English, and get him ready to attend school in America. Then it was my turn. I really was only asked a couple of questions. The Judge asked me why didn't we adopt children from America? I replied there were two reasons why. First, I stated I had five biological children of my own, and generally, young children in the U. S. were given to families that have no children of their own, and therefore, I would not have been chosen. Secondly, in the U. S. it is very difficult to get the parental rights terminated, in the case of caring for foster children that the family is trying to adopt. In many cases, the child will live with you for 2 or even 3 years and then be taken away to give the parents another chance. I told the Judge that being a very close family was important to me. Having a child join our family, and then be ripped away from us after we are all bonded together, is something I could never do to my children, and something I would not be able to endure. In Russia, the parents rights have already been terminated, and if we were granted permission to adopt these two brothers, they would become part of Our Forever Family.

One Child or Two?

2007-04-05T23:22:00.000-04:00

I almost wanted to call this blog...."One Lump or Two?" HA!! In our weekly adoption chat online we have through our agency, the discussion came up to adopt one child at a time or to adopt two? My personal opinion is this.....if you are wanting more than one child, then I would definitely go for two children at the same time. Yes, it is a bit harder at first, but besides being more financially economical, it is really, in the long run......A LOT EASIER than having another homestudy by some confused social worker...... redoing all the endless paperwork with notarizing and apostilling.....taking time off (from work, make arrangements for someone to take care of the rest of your family, find someone to feed your dogs and water the plants....etc.) for two separate plane trips to parts unknown (truly where angels fear to tread) and the general hassel and stress of it all, it is easier to bite the bullet and bring home the two kids, than to go back and do it all over again. Well......that is my vote at least. It was right for our family and our situation. Only you can decide what is right for yours.

"Tell Me, Please"

2007-04-02T23:46:00.000-04:00

The Judge began her interrogation. She began every sentence with "Ska-ZHIT-tee Pah-ZHA-owl-stah.........which means ....."Tell me, Please". Poor Wayne......he kept answering questions and again she would start with the "tell me, please"!! She wanted to know from Wayne how he would handle boys, since he had only girls biologically. The Judge told him that girls are very different from boys.....and how would he handle this. Wayne stated he had a very calm nature, and felt that calmness would help handle any problem or situation he would encounter with the boys. Again she says....."Tell me, please....." "Why do you want to adopt from Russia?" Why Russia? Wayne stated he has always been fascinated with the Russian Culture, and interested in Russia. He told her that since we have been married we have wanted to add children to our family, and felt this would be a good time to do so. This was our desire, to have more children. She then said "Tell me, please" ....."How do the other biological children feel about bringing these children into the family?" We told her they were very supportive. Although, we had called her earlier that morning to see if our children in Magadan (Tavia and Remmy) could attend court with us. The Judge said absolutely not.....she did not allow children in the Court Room.....but then, that was one of the biggest things she wanted elaboration on......."How did the children feel about adopting these boys?" Now....of course, she could have asked them in person, but she didn't allow them to come to the Court. Ahh....another mixed message!!

Continuing On with the Court Story

2007-04-01T23:25:00.000-04:00

Before Court started that morning, Wayne and I had already discussed it and had decided that I should be the one to answer and field most of the questions, as I felt the best prepared for our Court appointment. However, apparently the Judge did not want to hear from me……she directed all the questions to Wayne!! So much for our plan!! After our initial introductions, the Judge asked Wayne what was his impression of the boys. After she heard his answer, she directed a question to me that was “How did you find the children?”. To this question…..I was a bit confused. Surely the Judge knows that families that are adopting can only be referred a child from the MOE…..and surely she knows that our agency, Alaska International Adoptions, is the only agency that has been working in Magadan since the whole reaccreditation deal!!! ???? !!! I mean……I just stood there (you must stand whenever the Judge addresses you). So there I am, standing there…..all of this running through my mind, and I know she cannot be asking me any of these questions……because the answers are so obvious ( and Zoya is right there translating for me!!)!! Finally, I clarify, and say…”Do you mean how did we find the children when we met them?” “Yes”, the Judge replied. Well, that is not what I thought she meant!! I briefly told her about our encounter with the children, and how initially Kylen was afraid and cried, but that he really “warmed up” to us by the second day. Our visit with Sasha went very well, too. I told the Judge that he seemed happy and appeared to be comfortable with us. I told her both the children were very well cared for. The Judge brought up the fact that we both had biological children of our own, and she wanted to know why we wanted to adopt. We explained that we love our children and enjoy them so much. We told her we had a happy family and we wanted to continue to expand our family and share that love with more children. With that explanation, she turned to the page in our homestudy that explained why we wanted to adopt…..and read it word for word ( I guess to see if it matched????) !! Luckily for us, it said the same thing we had just recited in Court!!

More on Court

2007-03-31T01:58:00.000-04:00

Something Awesome Happened Today!!

2007-03-30T23:28:00.000-04:00

The last two days with the boys have been great!! Admittedly, the last two days have been Wayne's days to stay home.....and my days to work!! Maybe they save the acting our for Mom!! At any rate.....the kids seem to be back on track!! Today we went to our local Community College and met two of the basketball players (on scholarship to the College) who are .......RUSSIAN!!! Is that awesome or what??? You should have seen the HUGE smile on Kylen's face when he heard them " gah -vaht- EE- tee Pah- ROO- ski" (speak Russian)!! We had him ask Kylen if he liked it here in America? "Dah" , he said. We had them ask he if he liked living with his Mama and Papa? "Dah", he said. I thought he would elaborate a little more with someone speaking Russian, but he was kind of shy. But I am really happy because these two basketball players can be his interpreter for his Academic Assessment that the school system wants to give him. It is important for your school age child to have an assessment in their native language (preferentually) within the first 3 months of coming to America. The school system is supposed to provide this......but here in Podunk, USA, we have to provide our own interpreter!! Oh....the school system did offer to pur our child in the Special Education Class this fall!! Whatever!! At any rate.....it is important to have the assessment in their own language so you can determine what is a learning disability, academic deficit, etc...... versus them not understanding the language ( i.e. such as waiting and doing the assessment in English........and them possibly not understanding the English enough to score well, and it would be a false assessment of their true level of learned knowlege. So these guys are going to be helping us out.......cool, huh? Oh, and get this.......(this is HILARIOUS!!)! We were leaving the gym today after meeting Vitaly and Artem, and I smiled at Kylen, and pointed to the boys and said "Ya Roo-ski"! I repeated and pointed to them (meaning they are Russian)! He (Kylen) turned to me, raised up his shoulders ( as if to say "so??") and smiled at me.....pointed to himself and said " Ya ung- GLEE- ski!!" Saying......."I am English... (or American is what he meant!!). The kid cracked me up!! Can you imagine it!! Dear Blogger friends, I apologize for the brief hiatus......but I promise....the rest of the Court story this weekend!!

Two Steps Forward, Three Steps Back!!

2007-03-29T23:23:00.000-04:00

(Late Post) Well, I was warned by some of you that some of the very best days the children have are followed by some very difficult ones. Earlier this week was a trying time….so I apologize for the delay in posts!! The boys had a lot of crying and acting out. But….not to worry…..as I have heard so many of you say……and I have also read comments regarding this……that this is is a good sign. The children are feeling as though they can trust us to still accept them, even if they have bad behavior. I still feel we are making progress……but this is still a hard time right now.

The Cast of the Court

2007-03-27T00:15:00.000-04:00

The cast of the Court ( as our agency facilitator, Zoya, called it.....consisted of six people. They were......the Judge ( a female), the Prosecutor, the representative from the Guardianship Department (this was Svetlana, who observed us with Sasha the first meeting), the Chief Social Worker of the Magadan Specialized Baby Home, the Director of the Orutukan Boarding School (Ludmila) where Kylen attended school and lived), and, of course (kon-YESH-nah), the Court Recorder. As we began the proceedings, the Judge asked both of us (through Zoya, our interpreter)......she asked if we accepted that Zoya would be our interpreter for these proceedings, and if we trusted her to interpret correctly and honestly. We both stated that we trusted her and would accept her translation and interpretation as being in our best interest, as well as being honest. With that......we began!!

Court Preview

2007-03-26T00:48:00.000-04:00

This week I shall be writing about our experience in Court. It will be divided into several parts as our Court lasted over 3 hours!! Now, we did have a difficult Judge, but she was more the type that was very compulsive and wanted to go over everything in complete detail......I mean she even read pages from our home study!! It really was not that she was doubting our ability to be good parents (although she asked some difficult questions, I thought!!), the long time in court was due more to her wanting to be completely through!! So this week.......will be the story of Court !! Stay tuned!!

HEY!! Still More Progress!!

2007-03-25T00:44:00.000-04:00

WOW!! Tonight is the second night in a row that Kylen, our big boy, is sleeping in his own bed!! YAHOO!! Last night I celebrated being in my own bedroom WITH THE LIGHTS ON!! I watched a very scarey movie.....which made my adrenalin surge....so I was up late, and I was trying to catch up on all the blogs I have been unable to read of late. It was really so great to be relaxing in my own bedroom, making all of the noise I want, and flipping the TV channels. Then I came upon the scarey movie (about some kind of exorcism) and so I just keep on reading, and watching TV. I have not done that in forever!! It was a bit tough to put in 13 hours at the hospital today......but I made it. And now......another evening of having our bedroom just occupied by the parents (oh....and two dogs....and a cat.....all asleep on our bed)!! Oh, Well!! It was a good try! We almost made it sleeping alone at night!!

How to Have a Happy Flight

2007-03-24T00:58:00.000-04:00

Our boys are super travelers!! They did so well on the journey home, and we had such a long way to go!! The trick to traveling with a toddler on an airplane is to have 2 bags of Gerber dehydrated bananas and strawberries. Those work like magic! They are little tiny bits of fruit that would take forever to fill you up when eating them, and they are so yummy that your little person will be preoccupied with eating them one at a time in his little plastic bowl. The other very helpful item was a bottle!! Even though our boy had not taken a bottle in over a year, he figured it out on the plane, and believe me......it was helpful!! Having your toddler take a bottle, even when they have been weaned from it, is very helpful for attachment issues. It is good for your toddler to see you as the person providing their needs, and to learn how to trust that their needs will be met. I am guessing it helped with the changes in the altitude pressure on their ears as neither of the boys had the slightest problem with it! For our older boy, we took lots of activity books, mazes, and coloring pages to keep him occupied. He made seven trips to the bathroom on the airplane!! I am sure he did not "have to go" that frequently, but he enjoyed playing with the water, and I am sure he enjoyed the new found freedom of going by himself!! Overall, the boys traveled so well!! I hope you journey home is just as successful!!

A Successful Day!!

2007-03-23T00:24:00.000-04:00

We are definitely making progress!! Today Sasha came to me three times for comfort!! He also came up voluntarily and hugged my legs for the first time!! (We were outside and I was standing up…..hence he grabbed around my legs). He is sleeping a little more than he usually does, perhaps it is because he is teething and doesn’t always feel that well….but today I had to wake Sasha up at 10:00am and he still took a 3 hour nap…..I had to wake him at 4:00pm, in order to go to pick up Tav and Rem from track practice after school today, and he still went to bed around 8:30 pm!! Unbelievable!! Actually, both the kids are GREAT sleepers!! They have slept through the night….all night, every night since we have had them!! I hesitate to even write about it, because I don’t want to jinx myself!! HA!! Sasha usually goes to bed around 8:30 pm and sleeps 12 hours until 8:30 am the next morning. Kylen still does not want to sleep in his own bed in the room with his brother. We talked about it again tonight, and he said he still wanted to sleep in Mama’s and Papa’s room. I am not sure why he wants to still sleep in our room, since he is OK with taking naps in his own bed….but perhaps him staying in our room will hasten our bonding. However, if he does wake up before we do, like on a weekend and we are wanting to sleep in a little bit, he will just lay quietly on his little floor bed, whispering and playing there quietly. They are really “dream” children!! This morning when I woke up Sasha, I fed him breakfast, and then I held him and gave him a bottle. He has been doing better with this, and he has even been letting me help hold the bottle. He looked into my eyes only a couple of times, but non the less, we are making progress!! Tonight he let me rock and sing to him before I laid him in his crib. It was a standing type rock…as he is not into the rocking chair at all! I will keep trying though! The day was so nice outside that early this evening the kids played outside and they had such fun!! They are both doing so well. Sasha even discovered Rocks!! He carried these three rocks around for quite a while…..and said “ Rah” for rock!! He began to get tired and came to me for comfort. Kylen has made a lot of progress in that when we first had him, he would just get anything he wanted without asking……and now he has learned he must ask permission for everything. He usually gets what he asks for, but I feel it is important for him to ask. Some things he does not get…..like Nintendo DS or The PS2 video game (they belong to Tav and Rem) and I feel he can use his time more wisely right now. Any way, now he is always asking….but in Russian ..”Mama, mohz-nah deal-it?” (Mama, May I do it?) or …May I have …..? So now we need to work on saying it Pah – Eng- GLEE – ski!!

A Day at the Park!!

2007-03-21T23:56:00.000-04:00

Today Wayne took the boys to the park. They had a marvelous time! He took a couple of baseball gloves (mitts) and he and Kylen (our 8 year old) threw the ball back and forth. He also tossed the ball to Sasha, who was so enthralled with kicking and chasing the ball. I know Wayne had a dream come true today.....as he has never had a son, only daughters ( which he has truly adored both of them), but I know he had an unfulfilled dream come true playing with his sons today. The boys loved being outside too!! Today is really the first day that the older boy has played with his younger brother (he will be 28 months tomorrow). I guess that he has not been around children younger than age 6 and that he has not seen his brother except for a couple of brief times since the brother was 2 months old, he really has not known how to play with him. It looks as if this is going to change, and they will be interacting more together now that they are getting "settled in". My work schedule has been grueling since returning home. I have had to make up for all that time I had off so Wayne has been "Mr. Mom". In the past 7 days, I have had to work 6 shifts...all of them at least 12 hours, some have been 13 hours long. In addition, I came home coughing with the "Siberian Croup". I have been so tired and exhausted. The boys have been asleep by the time I get home, and I have seen them only for a few minutes in the morning before I dash off to the hospital. This morning, Sasha would not look me in the eye. He kept avoiding direct eye contact with me......not a good thing, but unfortunately, my schedule could not be helped. Wayne has done a fantastic job with the boys, and for now, we are trying to alternate our work schedules. He goes back to work tomorrow, and I am home with them for a few days. I hope we can resume our bonding. I am guessing they had so many different caregivers that they have learned to keep their distance emotionally as a protective mechanism. In the long run, love and persistance will pay off, (we hope).

Adjusting at Home

2007-03-20T23:10:00.000-04:00

The boys are soing so well!! They are adjusting to their new life in America quite nicely. The first few days we had a couple of our older girls in college and working, home to help integrate the boys. There seemed to be so much family around, I am sure they did not have much time to notice when someone was gone. For the most part, it was pretty peaceful. We had a few temper tantrums from Alexander. If he got angry about anything, he would throw whatever it was across the room (cookie, cup, toy....you name it), and then he would fling (flow himself hard down on the floor. We just tried to ignore it and get his mind off of it. Kylen did not want to sleep in his own bed. He said Sasha was too noisy, and wanted to sleep on a little palet in our room So far he has done well, with only a few "pouting" episodes when he is corrected or disciplined. Oh....and he asks for Coca Cola Light wherever he goes. Kylen has started to take a small day nap in his own bed in the room with Sasha, and then sleeps at night in our room on the floor. Everyday they wake-up happy and seem to be doing so well!!

One Missing Bag!!

2007-03-16T00:59:00.000-04:00

We arrived to Magadan on a Sunday afternoon, scheduled for our court date on that Monday, March 5th. I had heard "horror stories" of people losing their luggage, and had also heard of others who "carried on" their court clothes, just incase they were lost along the way. So, in our carry on luggage, we placed our dress clothes for court. We also had the forsight to "mix-up" the bags, so that in each piece of luggage, there were some of evesone's clothing (that way, if any of the luggage was lost, we would all still have clothes to wear). So we did that with all of the luggage, all except for one bag. This bag was the one with ALL of the boys clothes, socks, and underwear. Of course, THIS was the bag that was lost!! I did have their shoes and coats, warm hats and mittens packed away in another bag!! Delta Airlines said they would try to locate our missing bag, in the meantime, we would just have to make do. After court, in the afternoon, Ludmila brought over all of the clothes we had previously bought for Kylen. We were surprized to see this, as we thought they would stay in the orphanage to be used by the other children. However, everything came with him, so that solved his clothing problem. In downtown Magadan, we found a children's shop and picked up a little outfit for Sasha. It was not my first choice in what to dress him in when he left the Baby Home, but I knew I needed something. I have heard from others that the baby homes and orphanages will not give back the clothes you have given to your child to wear, and that especially on the day you leave the orphanage you must bring the clothing you would like for them to wear. Apparently this is not so in Magadan. We were scheduled to leave for Moacow on Wednesday afternoon. In magadan, since the 10 day waiting period is generally waived, they prefer to keep the child in the Baby Home at night, and you may visit, or get the child during the day. Keeping the child on the same schedule, and not disrupting their sleep patterns helps the child to adjust to the new parents and minimizes the stress experienced. When it was time for us to leave for the airport, we took our newly purchased outfit with us in order to dress Sasha. The caregivers at the Baby Home in Magadan are so loving. They took pride in dressing Sasha, and they picked out the best ourfit he had, and dressed him in it. Now, as I said earlier, I had a new pair of shoes. When I pulled them out (they waved them away), and they put on a pair of cute little snow boots. Then they got this cute hat and coat.....and only when they saw my hat and coat were going to be warm enough, did they decide to use my coat and hat I had brought. The caregivers took such pride in dressing him. They wanted to give him and dress him in the very best they had. WOW!! When he was finally all dressed and ready to go, they all had tears in their eyes. They loved him so much, and would really miss him, and felt sad......but at the same time they were so happy for him to go to a family that loved him. By the time we left, we were all crying!! It was a beautiful experience to see how loved Sasha was by his caregivers!! They truly are sweet, wonderful, giving women!! Oh....and the bag with all of the children's clothes was waitng for us upon our arrival to Moscow!!

HOME SWEET HOME!!!

2007-03-14T22:04:00.000-04:00

We are home safe and sound!! The kids were great travelers! For right now we are recovering from jet lag........and fatigue. Later this week I will post other information about our trip and all about our court date!! We are so happy to be home!! YIPPEEE!!

America Here We Come!!!

2007-03-13T03:17:00.000-04:00

This afternoon we begin our journey home. Spending time in another country, especially Russia, has made me realize how truly blessed we are to be Americans. I mean, of course I know this, but head knowledge and first hand experience are two different things. I am so grateful for the freedoms we have. We truly are a “land of plenty”. If only more people realized it. It is no secret (for those of you who know me personally…..and even those of you who do not) that I have whined about living in Missouri (remember….I call it “Misery”). A certain set of circumstances placed me here…..and now I am “stuck” here for a while. This second trip made me realize there are a lot of WORSE places to be “stuck” in….so hey Missouri…..I apologize. We have a wonderful home with lots of room for all of our combined children ( now NINE!!), and a huge yard, complete with fleas and ticks in the summer ….yes…..during the summer everynight is “tick check”…..gross!! When I first started pulling ticks out of creases and curves on my children’s body’s, it bothered me…….but now it is just like brushing your teeth before bed ( and if you DON’T do it…..you WILL be sorry!!). It will be so nice to be home again!! There are some things the Russians do better than Americans, though. There have been some who have criticized us for adopting internationally. They have wanted to know why we did not adopt here in the U.S. The main reason is because it is so hard to terminate the parental rights…..no matter what abuse may have occurred. Many times a child is placed into foster care for up to 3 years and then returned again to a dysfunctional or abuse family, all the while to endure more abuse. Meanwhile, the family that wanted to adopt the child is totally disrupted. I could not allow my other sweet children to become attached and bonded to a sibling, only to have them ripped apart from our family. So in that sense, the Russians have a great way of thinking. If they find abuse, the Guardianship Department steps in RIGHT AWAY and removes the child/children from the home and places them into a Rehabilitation Home. They give the parents one year to be rehabilitated……if after that year the parents have not done what is required, a court hearing is held, and the parental rights are terminated. The second thing I think the Russians do better than we do, is make the parents pay child support. Under Russian law, if your parental rights were terminated, this does NOT release you from your obligation to financially support your child!! If you have one child, there is an automatic deduction of ¼ of your salary garnished automatically, and it increases with each child. Alexander and Kylen’s biological parents were ordered to pay support at one third of their income every month. It was automatically deducted into a savings account for them. After court, I was presented with two savings accounts (one in each of their names) that had 500 rubles each in them (saved during a 2 year period). Granted, it is not a lot, but it is accumulated and given to them when they reach age 18 and would leave the orphanage, so that they would have some amount of money to get them started on their own. The last deposit in the accounts was made on February 19, 2007. It blows my mind to think that these parents had money deducted every month from their paychecks to support their children (I guess because it is the law), and never once came to visit them. Under Russian law, when parental rights are severed, one may still request visitations rights if one would like to have them. The parents did not request any visitation rights. It makes me feel sad….but then again, if things had not worked out this way, then Alexander and Kylen would not be on their way to America, and they would not have this new, great life that they are about to have. So….everything worked out for the best, although I am sure they both endured quite a bit of suffering to get to this point. As my Mom always says “All’s Well That Ends Well!!”. By the way…..we donated the amount in both savings accounts to the Baby Home and to the Boarding School.

A Special Sunday

2007-03-13T00:12:00.000-04:00

Today we went to church in Moscow. We happened to find a branch of the church we belong to (actually, there are six branches in Moscow). We attended the closest one, and had to walk 15 minutes to the Metro, and transfer twice. Then once we got off the Metro, it was still another 15 minute walk (although we walked for over an hour, because we could not find the building!! HA!) It was important to me to attend church in Russia, because I wanted Kylen to hear the gospel in his own native language, and to attend Primary, our children’s church. We had a wonderful time. Again, I was told that I LOOK Russian!! I think that is so funny! I took it as a complement, as there are some very beautiful Russian women out there. My image of the Russian woman has completely changed. Later that afternoon, the missionaries came over to our apartment and taught the first discussion to Kylen in Russian. It was so cool. They had these little illustrated pictures that were laminated and cut out in shapes of objects in the lesson (like our Heavenly Father, and Jesus, and the world, and clouds for heaven, etc). The Elders were so good with him and spoke perfect Russian!! It was great for Kylen to be able to ask questions and understand now what he will hear in English when we get home (only he doesn’t understand English now…..so that is why this was so cool!!). It was a really enjoyable experience. I am so glad we took the effort to go!!

Alexander's First Bath!!

2007-03-11T01:24:00.000-04:00

In the Orphanage, there was this long, enameled bath tub with a small overhead shower hose attached. Apparently, they lined up 3 or 4 (maybe up to 6 kids) in the tub and just hosed them down with a quick spray after they were soaped up, but it was no real bubble bath. Well, earlier this week, (actually the first full day we had him), we gave Alexander (Sasha) a bath. HE LOVED it! It looks like he might be crying, but he is not..........he is SQUEALING with pleasure!! He could hardly stop the splashing!! Of course (Kon-yesh-nah) He blew a gasket when we took him out!! Figures!!

Also.....check out Kylen Denis after he found the clothes pins we were using to hang up our laundry. He had a blast!! The kid is having all sorts of new experiences, and enjoying them all! His new name is going to be "Kylen Scissor Hands"!! HA!! I actually had to place limits on where he was allowed to put those things!! Crazy Kid!!

Hard Rock Cafe .....Moscow !!!! WOW!

2007-03-10T23:24:00.000-05:00

Hey !! !! Check out these pictures of our first formal dinner out together as a family at the Hard Rock Cafe on Starry Arbat Street. We had a GREAT time!! The kids were facinated by the helium balloons, and the baby LOVED ketchup!! The boys did so well!! Alexander (we call him Sasha) only had one minor meltdown......it was tolerable! Overall, the kids are getting along famously, so thank you all once again for your good thoughts and prayers!

Kross-nigha-PLO-shit (Red Square) and the Bolshoi Ballet

2007-03-10T17:24:00.000-05:00

On a couple of our other brave adenturings into the deep, dark , mysteries of Moscow, we were able to make it to Red Square and view parts of the Kremlin, Lenin's eternal tomb, and St. Basil's Catherdral. They were all so beautiful and enourmous.....even more magnificient in person!! I wish we had more time to spend there and tour some of the armories and see some of the thrones of the Czars and Czarinas........supposidly very ornate and beautiful. Unfortunately, our little man did what I call 'blowing a gasket", but on second thought, he did what I would classify as......BLOWING AN ENTIRE ENGINE!!! If you zoom up on the picture....you can see the face of the little guy is completely red and his scream sounded like the alarm at the Kremlin going off. In fact, these soldiers showed up immediately to protect the Motherland!! HA!! We tried to eat in MacDonalds on Red Square...by then he was really in frenzy! You wouldn 't believe all the looks I got in there holding a SCREAMING baby. I was ready to post a sign overhead stating "Institutionalized Child: Translation-- Does not like to be held or rocked. It was a sight non-the-less! I finally got him halfway calmed down by looking at the display of Happy Meal toys.......it was less than efficient, but worked enough to get some bread crusts down him and refain some control!! The top picture is "Sasha passed out" from being so worked up!! Poor Little Guy!! HEY!! What am I saying??? Poor Little Family!! A blogger friend of mine suggested getting a videotape of his "blowout"....ans she swears when the child "views" the tape and sees their behavior....that it cures it!! Maybe I should try it!!

The Bolshoi Ballet was performing Swan Lake and Tavia and Remmy and I went, while Wayne stayed home with the boys (he said they got along famously!!). The ballet was SO AWESOME!! And......(hold your breath.....and drum roll please.....) We EVEN took the Metro and got there all by ourselves (using our intelligent cyrillic skills interpreting the Russian alphabet, using our incredible speaking skills conversing in Parouskie with the natives (more like Izven-ye-tiah -Excuse me- Gydere blah, blah blah ---Where is....? OR my personal favorite: "Goo-vad-etee Parouskie??" HA!! At Any rate....we rode the Metro ALL OVER Moscow for 3 days and got where we wanted to go!! I am so proud of myself!! (Well. there was this one day we had to call a cab to take us home, because we apparently took the wrong turn out of the metro station and got "turned around" so to speak, and then did not seem to be able to get to where we wanted to go........but Wayne was in charge that day!! HA!! The inside of each Metro station looks like an art museum. I'll post more on that at another time! Wow, did we ever have a fun and interesting time!! OK.....now.....Where is my Navigator???? Smiles!!

More of the Boys!!

2007-03-09T23:46:00.000-05:00

Here are some additional pictures of Kylen (Big "D" - Denis - pronounced Denise) and Alexander, with the Russian nickname of "Sasha". We have an "Aunt Denise in our family, and we all liked the name "Kylen", so we decided to call him this name, but keep "Denis" still in his legal name. He likes his new name and seems to be happy with it. Yesterday we went to the American Embassy to process paperwork, and met a couple from Alabama also adopting a boy (age 5) who was named "Denis" also (toe-zhah). He was given the new name of "Sloan", which is a very nice American name, but it means "elephant" in Russian, and the little boy was mad when he was called this!! I told Kylen this boys name, and he burst out laughing!! Hopefully, this little guy will get used to his name! Fortunately for us, Kylen likes his new name!!

Aren't those guys just adorable?? They play so well together, and are doing quite well, considering we have just totally disrupted their lives!!

Our Two New Children!!!

2007-03-09T17:07:00.000-05:00

Introducing our new children: Kylen Mikhail Denis Fricke (pronounced Frickey) age 8, and Alexander Gordon Fricke age 27 months!! They are adorable and we are so happy!!

Off We Go!!

2007-03-07T12:00:00.001-05:00

We are just getting ready to check out of our hotel and leave for the airport. We are stopping by the Baby Home to pick-up our little guy, and then we are off to Moscow!! Our little man DOES NOT like to be held......this should be interesting!! One thing we have learned about our big boy...........DO NOT GIVE THE KID SUGAR!! He becomes a wild and rapidly moving child!! All morning the only word said has been "Nyet"....and now he is now hiding under his jacket, and pouting. (And he sucks his thumb). I am sure it is his way of comforting himself and settling himself down.....and we have yet to find out what the little guy does to settle himself down.....probably rocking. We shall see tonight. The big boy has his own backpack full of fun stuff for the plane ride to Moscow.....and that is part of the problem, he wants to play with it now. It is for later (POE - zhah). OK....thanks for all the prayers everyone!! We are so blessed!!

Sad Goodbyes

2007-03-06T06:54:00.001-05:00

After Court yesterday, we needed to run around and get started on the paperwork for new birth certificates and passports. We asked the judge if the 10 day waiting period could be waived and she said "yes"....so tomorrow afternoon we leave fo Moscow. I can hardly believe this is our last night in Magadan!! The time has flown, but are pretty tired from being so busy!! Today the passports were ready....and we picked them up this evening, as well as the new birth certificates. It is amazing to me that everything stays open so late here. Some of the places we needed to to go to did not even open until 3:00pm, Wow...in our little rural town nothing stays open past about 5:00 pm, and even on Saturday the stores close by 12 noon!! It seems weird that all the stores are open late in the evening here. Nonetheless, we got everything accomplised. We have been just visiting the little one in the Baby Home in the early evening for a little bit of playtime together. He is doing well getting used to us little by little. Tomorrow will be the big day when he leaves the Baby Home forever! He is not used to any strange sounds, or even being in the outside, because it is so cold in this region. Even in the summer, the high temperatures are only in the 50"s......so the children/babies rarely go out into the weather. The noise of the cars and airplane, combined with the strangeness of the sounds in the city I am sure will be enough to cause a nervous breakdown!! We shall see if it is his breakdown or mine!! HA! Speaking of nervous breakdown.......our older boy said "Goodbye" to Ludmila, his caregiver from the boarding school today. Ohhhh, it was so sad!! He cried, I cried, Tavia cried, ...Wayne and Remmy just sat there feeling bad for him. He told Ludmila he was not afraid that we would hurt him, or even that he would not be happy with us, because everything was going just fine, and he and the kids have been playing just famously......but he was sad because this "Goodbye" meant that he would never see Ludmila again. He was very sad. Ludmilla gave him the biggest pep talk ever. After a few more tears ( all around), he was just fine and the kids later went out and built a snowman together!! Oh! Ludmilla said she would like for him to call her at least every other month, to let her know how he is doing. OK.......I guess that is yet another son that is going to run up the phone bill.!! Yesterday we found out we have an official family photographer!! Our older boy has such a fascination with our digital camera that he actually wore out newly charged batteries!!! He took pictures of everything from light sockets and switches to the pages of books!! We have to be careful of what we are doing, because he is definitely one of those candid camera guys!! As soon as we arrive in Moscow and we have high speed internet, I promise to post pictures of the boys. They are a joy and a delight!! We are looking forward to many wonderful adventures with them in our forever family!! More information later!!

CELEBRATIONS ARE IN ORDER!!

2007-03-05T23:47:00.001-05:00

HOORAY!! After a grueling 3 hour court session with a scrutinizing judge with an "eye" for extreme detail, we became parents of two sweet Russian Boys!! The judge was very thorough and thoughtful and all of the supporting cast of the court were very positive and supported the adoption. I will explain more of the process and the details later this week. All in all it was a beautiful experience even though a bit long!! We are glad it is over!! We will give the details later this week. When they Prounounced us as the Proud Parents, Wayne started to cry!! He is so sweet and sensitive. As soon as I saw his tears of joy and relief, then I too, joined in!! Everyone present was happy for us. We are physically exhausted from playing with and chasing the boys today. They are both so sweet.......but very active. Wayne and I have decided we will both need to start taking Geritol just to keep up (HA!) In addition, we are emotionally drained from court this morning, so we will fill all of you in on the details later this week. Thank you all for you prayers! We felt your strength and love all the way here in Siberia!! We appreciate all your thoughts, prayers and well wishes!! We are so blessed to have these children in our family now, and to have the wonderful support and encouragement from all of you. Many times you held us up high with encouragement when we were discouraged over some "snag" in the process. God Bless all of you for helping us!! Tonight the whole family is Happy!! More to come........

PRAYERS PLEASE!!!

2007-03-05T09:14:00.000-05:00

Court is in one hour....please pray for us!! We are told we have the hardedst judge of the four of them!!

Arrival in Magadan

2007-03-04T20:30:00.000-05:00

Hooray !! We are here!! We are all extremely tired.....but are checked into a very nice, but pricey apartment here in the hotel. It has enough room for 2 parents and 4 kids....so that is all that matters, It is Sunday afternoon, and in the morning we have Court!! We are so excited!! After getting checked into the Hotel, Zoya came over to take us all to see Little "A" in the Baby home. We needed to get his passport so we went to do that. He was so adorable and the kids thought he was so cute!! I hope that is a good "omen" that we went to take his passport photo BEFORE the court date......we shall see. The Orphange dressed him in some black knickers and cream colored tights with a tie and vest. He was so adorable! then they put on his black overpants and we were off to take his piC! He did very well and is even saying his first word "DI" which is " give me" (everytime we tried to take his bear away from him for the picture). "D" is on his way driving down from the interior of Siberia tonight for court in the morning!!

Siberia or Bust!!!

2007-03-02T14:55:00.001-05:00

Here we are ready to board Delta to fly to Moscow. We had a little bit of difficulty arriving in Atlanta, having to be re - routed.....but we made it!! Our flight is boarding!!! Next stop....is Russia!! We have Tav and Rem with us!! ! Fun! Fun!! Fun!!

Addendum

2007-02-28T23:15:00.000-05:00

P.S. I spent all this time using spaces and columns listing the schedule so it would look neat AND be readable......however, blogger just ran it all together. Sorry about that!! I hope you can understand it!

Baby Home Schedule

2007-02-28T22:51:00.000-05:00

When we visited little "A" in the Baby Home, his groupa had a schedule posted listing what they did each day. I copied it, in hopes of being able to provide some continuity, that is, provided we survive the "time travel". I will share it with all of you. 7:00 - 8:00 am Awake and dress 8:00 - 8:30 am Breakfast 9:00 - 10:30 am Play and lessons ( We had to wait for "A" to finish his "music class before we met him the first day!) 10:30 - 11:30 am Walk for exercise (in a large upstairs room) 11:30 am Lunch 12:30 - 3:00 pm Day Nap 3:00 - 3:30pm Play 3:30 - 4:00 pm Snack 4:00 -5:00 pm Play, therapy, and walk 5:00 - 6:00 pm Walk 6:30 - 7:00pm Dinner 7:00 - 7:30 pm Play or watch TV ( TV????) 8:00 pm Bedtime until 7:00 am When I asked the caregiver if little "A" slept through the night, or if he awoke at all........did he cry at night or just settle himself back down......etc.. The caregiver told me she only worked the day shift and had no idea what he did at night!! Well, OK then!! I guess I will soon be finding out!!

Rural Countryside of Magadan Oblast

2007-02-27T21:23:00.000-05:00

These are some homes outside the city of Magadan. They are small without roads leading up to them. I am not sure how the occupants enter them.....they must have a tunnel they have dug somewhere!!

The Siberian Stroller

2007-02-26T23:29:00.000-05:00

Late Post I had problems connecting to the internet the last couple of trys......so this is a late post. The above picture shows a little hand pushed sleigh to use in the snow and ice to transport children. I wish I had gotten a picture of a child getting a ride......it is so cute!! The child is all bundled up in his little fur trimmed coat.....and away they go!! I'll try and get a picture of a child riding. You see the parents pushing the toddlers all around the town. Cool idea, huh?

Fun, Sun, and Sand!!

2007-02-25T21:58:00.000-05:00

We have been thoroughly enjoying ourselves here in Puerto Rico!! Unfortunately, the "spray on" sunscreen did not work!! YIKES!! We got a little more sun than planned!! Take my advice .... just use the old fashioned lotion!! I think it works much better!!

Today I had to call my credit card company to approve my expenses. Apparently, a hold was placed on the credit card due to suspected fraudulent activity. It would appear that most "normal" people do not travel to the Caribbean, then 4 days later travel to Siberia!! They thought all of the recent airline ticket purchases within such a short travel timeframe looked suspicious and I was requested to call them!! HA!! I explained the situation, so now we are back in business!! We will travel home tomorrow, and I shall finalize the remainder of the shopping needed for the boys on the return trip home, as well as tie-up all the loose ends before we go!! I had better get that list going to make sure we don't forget anything!!!!

By the way, the picture at the top is a REAL picture, taken by me, and NOT a postcard, even though it is good enough to be taken by a professional photographer!! HEY!! Maybe now that I am finished with this medical degree I could start a new profession as a photographer???? (Just kidding, family!! Smiles!!)!

On Friday it is.....Siberia or Bust!!

Dr. Susan M.D. !!!! WOW!!

2007-02-24T23:10:00.000-05:00

YAHOO!! Tonight the Degree of Doctor of Medicine was conferred upon me!! Before my friends, family, and fellow classmates, I took the Oath of Hypocrates and did swear to uphold that high standard as long as I shall practice Medicine! I attended Medical School on the British Island of Antigua, but for the last three years I have been doing my clinical rotations in the United States. I guess a few people forgot to get their passorts (New January 1st law) and that is why our graduation is in Puerto Rico, instead of Antigua (which has 365 different beaches....it is a beautiful island!!) People always ask me "What is it like to go to Medical School in the Caribbean?". I always say "It is a rough life.....but somebody's got to live it!"!! HA!! I am so happy to enjoy this moment, and so relieved to have this degree behind me!! Now it is on to bigger and better things!! This week .......A Doctor!!! Next week.......Mother of two Russian boys!! I really was not kidding about going 105 miles per hour! It is life in the fast lane, and life at it's best!! I am so grateful, and I am so blessed!! Let's get going!!

The Baby Home and Magadan City Housing

2007-02-23T22:39:00.000-05:00

Above is the Baby Home in Magadan ( some additional pictures) a.k.a. "Magadan Specialized Children's home, and some housing in the city that is located right next to the baby home. Apparently, the housing in the city is designed more like "flats" or apartments. The housing in the countryside is more like very small, one or two room houses (I will post those later). These apartments pictured above sit right beside the Baby Home. We finalized our travel plans today and we have tickets to travel to Magadan on March 2nd. Some of you know that I had to travel to Puerto Rico on business, a school requirement, which has us somewhat scrambling to get ready for our next trip to Russia. We will only have about 3 days to pack and get organized for the trip. But before we can pack the wool and fur for Siberia, I will need to UNpack the swim suits and sunscreen!! I know you are feeling sorry for me!! We are very much enjoying the beach, sand and warm weather right now. It is so hard to imagine that will experience about a 90 degree temperature change, going from a high of 85 degrees, to dropping to 25 below zero!! I don't care, though. I am so ready to go and bring these boys home!! We can hardly wait!!

More of Siberia

2007-02-22T22:21:00.000-05:00

I am preparing myself for more of the cold weather and snow in Siberia, as in about ONE week, we will be traveling on Trip 2 to bring our boys home!! I went shopping a couple of weeks ago to try and find some sweaters and warm clothes to dress them in for the trip home. Of course, (kohn-YESH-nah) once February rolls around, the stores have gotten rid of their warm, winter clothes (for the most part), and start getting in their spring outfits and summer things!! Doesn't anyone know I am traveling to Siberia and I have to dress my boys warmly?? At any rate, I got them both the cutest sets of matching shorts and matching summer shirts!! They will look adorable (here in the States in the fun spring, warm weather)!! But.......I gotta get something warm to bundle them up for the trip home!!

Hold Onto Your Hats, Boys and Girls!!!

2007-02-20T23:02:00.000-05:00

COURT DATE!!! Here we go!! We have a court date for March 5th!! There was apparently an original assignment of February 28th, which we tried to see if we could arrange, but we are required to be on an out of town trip at least until February 25th....which made it kind of tight to get to Magadan by the 28th. So now we are to arrive for a March 5th date!! HOORAY!! We are very excited.......not exactly ready..........but whoever is?? We live our life at 90 miles per hour, so I guess it is time to strap on our seat belts, 'cause HERE WE GO!!!!

A Sweet Farewell

2007-02-19T23:51:00.000-05:00

We had just finished enjoying a wonderful afternoon with "D". He had really "warmed up" to us and was completely trusting of us dragging him up and down the street, into beauty parlors and coffee shops.....in search of food!! He was very relaxed in the restaurant with us, as well as being sweet and cooperative. After returning to our hotel room we enjoyed more playtime with him. Then we heard a knock at the door. It was Ludmilla, his caregiver and Zoya, our facilitator. They asked him if he had fun, and he said "dah", yes he had. Then they asked him if he would like to come to America to live with us, and for him and his brother to become part of our family. He replied yes (besides, the older man who was the driver of the car bringing him here to meet a potential family wanting to adopt had told "D" "I wish they would adopt me!! I would go with them!!". "D" seemed totally at ease. We gave him a hug and a kiss, and he gave both of us a hug back, and he gave me a kiss, too!! I said to him "Ya LOO blue tib-YAH" ( I love you). "D" said to us " See you in two months" and " I am going to go back to my school and tell all my friends about all the things I saw in town, and about my Papa and Mama and my new family". We hugged again, told him "Pa -kah" (Bye) and he left with his caregiver to return to the boarding school.

I Hope We Can Eat This!!

2007-02-18T23:52:00.000-05:00

While we were at the Baby Home earlier that day, our adoption coordinator asked “D” several questions about things that he liked, and she interpreted for us. He told her all about the foods he did and did not like. One of the things he mentioned he disliked was fish (reeba). Nyet reeba!! So as we are looking through the menu at the pictures, “D” sees something that looks like a chicken breast, but it is fish. He points to that and nods his head telling me that is what he would like. I tell him “Etta reeba”(this is fish). He gets an awful look on his face and shakes his head no and says “Nyet”. I am trying to ask him if he likes chicken (I just heard earlier that morning that he did like it. I look up the word for “chicken” in my handy-dandy Russian dictionary with transliterated words……HOLY CANNOLI!! Can any body say “chicken” in Russian?? It has about eleventy-seven letters in it….and I am having a hard time pronouncing it! I mean, I know a lot of long hard words like: pheochromocytoma and vanillylmandelic acid (reminds me of Millie Vanilly- for those of you that remember THAT fiasco) and thiazolidinediones……but I could NOT say “chicken”!! So…. here I am, at the table in the Chinatown restaurant, trying to communicate this to him. I get this idea (some of you remember we brought puppets with us to play with the children) and I pretend I have a puppet on my hand, and I am moving my hand up and down, and saying “BOK !! BOK!!” Now I am using both hands ….and clucking. I guess I am causing quite a stir in the restaurant with my chicken sounds, but he finally gets it and agrees to eating chicken!! I am so glad they did not serve “elephant” because THAT impression is really loud!! HA! The waitress comes and somehow I get the idea across that we would like a dish for the three of us consisting of noodles, chicken, and vegetables. When she hears “vegetable” she says “Oh, dah! Salat?” (Salad). I said nyet, and tried to explain about stir fry vegetables in with the chicken. After some time, she finally nodded her head and left. I looked over at Wayne and told him that we had better brace ourselves, because I am sure she is coming back with “fried eye balls” or something like that!! Alas! The food arrives, and it is really pretty good, to our surprise!! We got something like sweet and sour fried chicken in noodles and vegetables. You should have seen the look on “D”’s face when he looked at the food when it was served. I put some on his plate, he poked it with his fork, wrinkled his nose at it, tried to smell it, took a bite, shrugged his shoulders, and then wolfed it down!! HA!! After we are arrived back at the hotel later that afternoon, he was asked what he had for lunch. He told them he liked what he had very much, but he had no idea what it was!! Our lunchtime with “D” was very pleasant. He was curious about everything. He wanted to try all of the sauces on his food, which I let him, all except the HOT sauce. I did not know how to say “bolshoi spicy”, so I just said “Nyet” with no explanation and he was fine with it. He said his first word in English, too. I held up a fork and said “Vilka”. He looked and me and replied “Dah, Vilka”. Then I said “Fork”. He replied “ffffffffffffffffffffffffork.” “Mal ah dyets” we replied ( what a good boy/child)!! He smiled and seemed pleased with himself. We enjoyed our lunch, and when we were finished, the waitress took away our plates. Then “D” proceeded to start organizing the table, replacing the sauces, salt, pepper, sugar, etc. He then looked over at the waitressing station and saw all the little bamboo placemats all rolled up and stacked. He reached over and took all of the bamboo placemats on our table, and rolled them up exactly as he saw them, and then walked them over and placed them in the stack with the others!! I am thinking….. “Hey, they might want to wipe those down first”, but, I didn’t know how to say it…so we just let him carry on!! He is a very thoughtful boy. It is time to pay and I ask the waitress “Skolka yow dahs-NAH?’ (how much do I owe ?). She brings us the bill, we pay, get our coats and start the journey back to the hotel. When we arrived at the hotel, we played together for about 30 minutes before it was time to leave. We got out the playdough with a shape press, and he had a blast making different shapes and squeezing the playdough. I don’t think he had played with something like that before now. We played cars and colored, and built another lego (well, we tried to, but Papa needs a little more practice). It was almost time to go, and his caregiver would be arriving soon, and they would be traveling back to the boarding school in the Yagodninsky Village in the interior of Siberia. We will soon be saying “Good-bye”.

Something to Drink

2007-02-17T23:01:00.000-05:00

After we are seated in the restaurant at a booth and given menus, we decide to get something to drink first. That will be a lot easier, we think, than trying to figure out what food to order for now. Wayne and I request our standard "Coca-Cola Light". For those of you who are diet coke drinkers and who may not have traveled out of the country yet......Diet Coke is called "Coca-Cola Light" in many other countries, including Mexico, and now Russia. After we had ordered our Diet Cokes, I looked over at "D" to ask if he would like to have some milk ( Mal-ah- KOH). He innocently looks at me and says "Nyet, Coca Cola Light. WOW!! Now I am thinking........hey, how do I explain that children should not drink sodas and pop, but should have nutritious things to drink like milk and juice. I look over at Wayne and ask him how do I explain nutritional value to him?? Blah, blah, blah, etc. Then, after a minute, I shrug my shoulders, look at the waitress and tell her "3 Coca Cola lights!! Then the three of us sit there quietly for a while, sipping on our sodas while we decide on the main course.........Part 2 tomorrow.

The Lunch Story Continues

2007-02-16T23:27:00.000-05:00

Finally we have arrived at the Chinatown Restaurant. We enter and I ask if we can get something to eat (stone ya boot pah yest?) “Dah” the gentleman replies. I ask does he speak English - guh-vahd-etee pah- ung- GLEE-ski? After all, we ARE in a building with the English word “CHINATOWN” printed on the front!! Unfortunately, he shakes his head “no”. I look at my husband (moi mosh) and tell him “Oh Great!” in a sarcastic tone. The gentleman then holds out his hands and opens a door to a closet. “I think he wants to take our coats” I say. The three of us slowly disrobe from our heavy overcoats, hats and gloves and the gentleman hangs them in the coat closet for us. We then follow him to a table where we are given menus…..in Russian of course!! (Kon-yesh-na!) Wait until you hear about our ordeal of ordering the food!!

Continuing on in Pursuit of Lunch!!

2007-02-15T23:54:00.000-05:00

We continued on down the sidewalk in search of a place for lunch. Again, we came upon an open building with lights on inside. It looked like it might be a restaurant. We became hopeful………FOOD!! As we approached the door and entered, I noticed tables. HOORAY, I thought. The man behind the counter looked at us. I said to him questioningly “stone-ye-boot (soft “T” sound….Russians don’t pronounce a hard “t” sound here) we-pit e stone-ye-boot pah yest? (Something to eat and something to drink?) He looked at me and said “Dah, Coffee and Cakes”. I replied to him “Nyet, spy – see- bah”, meaning ‘No thank you’. We turned around and walked back out into the cold. Now, I think “D” is beginning to wonder what we are doing. Are we simply just walking in and out of stores for the fun of it? If so, it has turned out to be not very much fun!! HA!! Now I am beginning to get worried. I see all these words on the buildings, all of them written in Russian, and I cannot find the Restaurant. Now “D” does read Russian, but we don’t know how to ask him to tell us when we come upon the Chinese Restaurant. So….we keep walking down the snowcovered sidewalk in the cold. I am so concerned we will not be able to recognize it, now that we have had two false alarms!! Suddenly, ahead on the left, I see something gold and red. As we take a few steps closer I can see there are some columns ahead next to the front of the next building we are coming toward. My heart gets a little excited……I am thinking “FOOD??? Well, maybe……HOPEFUL we will get food!! Then I see it, 4 gold and red painted oriental columns just on either side of a large black door. “This must be it!!” I exclaimed to Wayne. We had finally arrived, and we were hoping this was the right place. I looked up and above the door was written in large, ENGLISH letters “CHINATOWN”!! Wayne and I looked at one another and burst into laughter!! We worried and fretted we would not recognize the Chinese Restaurant……..and there it was…..as big as life itself…..and of all things……Pa Eng-GLEE-skee (In English)!!!!! I wish I had taken a picture to post, but for sure, I shall get one on the return trip!! HA!! It was very funny!!

BE MINE VALENTINE !!!

2007-02-14T23:09:00.000-05:00

I was secretly hoping the information regarding our Court Date would be in my e-mail tonight when I arrived home!! Sadly. there was no updated news, nor was there a date for court!! I now know what it was like for all of you waiting to get your date, feeling anxious, wanting to make travel plans, but no real dates to do so. It is like developing OCD, an obsessive compulsive disorder.......checking e-mail, then checking it again.....and again, but yet there is nothing there. That is the oldest definition of insanity......doing the same thing over and over again, but yet expecting a different result!! Oh well, maybe tomorrow!! HA!! Happy Valentines Day everyone!! Today I want Little "A" and Big "D" to be MY valentine, and I can hardly wait until they will BE MINE!!

Going into town to have lunch (Finally!!)

2007-02-13T23:56:00.000-05:00

We left the hotel in search of an open restaurant so that we could feed “D” before his long drive back into the interior of Siberia in Magadan Oblast (Region). The picture shows the sidewalk we walked down in search of food!! We set out on our journey to find the Chinese Restaurant. As we walked down the sidewalk we noticed the third building on the left had the lights on and was an open establishment. “Hooray” I said to Wayne. I was so glad that we did not have to walk far in order to get lunch. We opened the door and entered. To our surprise we saw a chair with a hair dryer attached! We had walked into a beauty parlor!! OOPS!! I grabbed “D’s” hand, and out we went!! He had this really funny look on his face like “You want to get your hair done?? I thought we were having lunch!!" I am sure he was bewildered…..and I am willing to bet that is the beginning of MANY episodes of bewilderment!!

TODAY'S NEWS!!!

2007-02-12T23:00:00.000-05:00

WOW!! I knew you guys out there were thinking good thoughts for us and saying prayers for us..........but I did not know you all were THAT good!! We got it!! We got our release letter!! WOOHOO!! Our facilitator in Magadan, Zoya, received the letter today, and e-mailed Olga, who in turn notified us!! I am so amazed!! I am told we will have a COURT DATE by the end of the week!! This is outstanding and we are so excited!! So......since all of you out there who thought good thoughts and said sincere prayers were SO effective......I was wondering......I have this HUGE list of other things I need to pray for and get answers????? Maybe you guys could help me out !!! (Smiles!!)

Back to the Future!!

2007-02-12T01:37:00.000-05:00

I am pausing from the continuation of our saga to post a quick update in the hear and now. Up until this point, I have been recanting the story of meeting our two boys in Magadan, Russia. I wanted to deviate tonight from that to give everyone the "status quo" on the adoption. We are currently waiting for our "Release Letter" from Moscow, and as soon as this is done, then we can apply for a Court Date!! The release letter removes the boys from the data base that would allow other foreigners to adopt them. That is one giant step closer to us having our boys!! Of course, (Kon - YESH - na), we still have the possiblity of a Russian family or relatives coming forward before court. I say it is not over until it is over!! We have to trust God for that part. If He wants these boys to come to our family, then He will be the one to accomplish it!! Here is to hoping our Release Letter comes this week!! WooHoo!!

The Hotel

2007-02-10T23:46:00.000-05:00

This is a picture of our hotel, the VM Centralnaya, that I took on our way to lunch. OK........so I was a little crooked when I took it....but we were hungry......and it was cold!! My hands were probably shaking!!! The word on the front of the building says "HOTEL". HA!! If you can pronounce Russian, you will see it reads "Gah-STEEN-yitzah" which means 'hotel'. I know, I know (YAZ nigh-0) (rhymes with high) ....it has SO MANY letters in the word to just say -hotel-. But hey, wait until you get your Russian copy of your official letter from the MOE inviting you to meet a child. The letter says : "DEAR (wife and husband)....... like ours said DEAR Susan and Wayne. The word for "dear" has exactly eleven letters in it!! WOW!! I don't know what they are saying exactly with those eleven letters, but surely it has to be more than just "DEAR"!! HA! It just strikes me as funny!! So now we are off on foot in pursuit of a hot meal!! Stay tuned!! OH LOOK!! I just noticed.....on the very TOP of the building next to the roof, it does say in English (pah ungh - GLEE - ski) ...it says HOTEL!! Wow! I guess I read that Russian correctly after all!!

Deciding to go into Town

2007-02-09T23:53:00.000-05:00

After we arrived at the Hotel and discovered the Hotel Restaurant was closed, we inquired at the front desk as to what to do. The attendant at the desk told us there were two restaurants open that day in town. One was an establishment serving Russian Cuisine that was somewhere up the hill and to the right. The second restaurant was down the hill and to the left. This establishment served Chinese food. Well, it did not take us long to decide to have the authentic Russian cuisine!! I explained to the clerk behind the desk that my husband ( moy mosh) and I do not speak or read Russian ( I will add I have learned to pronounce Cyrillic, but I still don't know what most of the words mean!!). I told her this boy we were with both spoke Russian fluently, and he also read quite well. With that she proceeded to give him directions to the Russian Restaurant. Wayne and I just sat there patiently while she explained. Now at this point, I should probably tell you a small detail I omitted earlier!! When Ludmila, "D's" boarding school caregiver, was going over his file and records with me ( through an interpreter) she made a very specific point. She stated that "D" seemed to be very disoriented in his environment. He had great difficulty finding his way around by himself and was NOT good at directions. We attributed this to his current environment and constraints of living in an orphanage/boarding school, and the fact that these children are constantly supervised. In fact, "D" made this comment in the car on the way to Magadan: He told Ludmila that he was afraid to come to a big town like Magadan (OK.....BIG all depends on your frame of reference!!). He was saying that he was worried that he might become lost. He said he had already decided what he would do if that happened. "D" said he would walk around in town until he found a Policeman, and he would go up to him to say that he was "lost". We all remarked that demonstrated excellent problem solving ability. So....now back to the story. The clerk gives these elaborate instructions to the place with the Russian food, and then asks "D" if he understands. He looks back at her so innocently and states "Nyet". So then the clerk gets out paper and draws some extensive directions, and then asks the boy if he now understands. She barely gets the question out and he says quickly again "Nyet". OK, she trys one more time.....(you gotta hand it to her with having all that persistence!! This time in the explanation she uses elaborate hand gestures and motions....and she is getting louder too! Once again the boy quickly says "Nyet". This time I step in, remembering what I was told about him. Being oriented to the environment is something he is just not used to!! I now speak to the clerk and ask her which one of these two restaurants is the closest?? (Remember, it is 20 degrees below zero out there and we are walking!!!) YIKES!! The clerk tells us the closest Restaurant is the Chinese establishment. We get some brief directions and decide to brave the elements outside ourselves. So we bundle back up, and off we go into the wild blue yonder to fill our tummies!! Make that the wild WHITE yonder. I'll post pictures later, as well as tell you more about our afternoon!!

Continuing with the Story

2007-02-08T23:49:00.000-05:00

We had a good morning at the Baby Home with the boys playing together that morning. It also proved to be very profitable as I learned more of “D’s” background, and came to understand why he was so afraid. This sweet little boy has the desire to have a family mixed with the fear of his past. He was finally beginning to relax a little, and to feel comfortable with us. Soon it was lunchtime. We told little “A” - “ko-shoot” – time to eat. I quickly picked him up, thinking I would carry him back to his groupa for lunch. As soon as I picked him up, he became quite upset and started to cry. Apparently he is not used to being held. The caregivers are so busy, there is no time to hold or rock the children. He wants to walk everywhere he goes, holding onto someone’s hand, and he also wants to feed himself, and does not like any help!! So, we all walked him down to his groupa, and hugged and kissed him goodbye. “D” hugged his brother, said something to him in Russian, and then walked back to the room where we were playing earlier. We picked up the toys and decided we would eat lunch as well. “D” was asked if he wanted to spend the rest of the afternoon with us, or stay with his caregiver. He spoke up bravely and said he would like to spend the rest of the day with us. Wayne and I were both so happy to have some alone time with him. This would be interesting communicating with him without a translator!! Our facilitator took us back to our Hotel, where we were planning to have lunch in the Hotel Restaurant. Zoya let us out, and we went into the hotel……only to find out the Restaurant was closed for the Old New Years Holiday. YIKES!! Now we will need to find somewhere to feed “D” lunch, as he leaves to return to his boarding school in three and one-half hours…..and it will be a six hour drive back to the little village! Well…..I guess we shall venture out into the city….on foot….to feed our boy!! Wait until you hear what happens!!

Magadan Cathedral

2007-02-07T23:52:00.000-05:00

Sorry guys.......after a long 13 hour shift at work my brain is bordering on mush!! So I thought I would tell you this is the new Cathedral they are currently building in Magadan. It is actually the only Cathedral in Magadan, and it is Russian Orthodox. Hopefully on our next trip we will have a little more time. I would love to go and check it out, and attend a service. I am sure it would be so interesting. The front of the Cathedral has all copper roofing. I don't have a picture of the front, but I shall have to get one on our next trip and post it. This Cathedral is quite beautiful, and I decided to use it as my personal "logo" for all my posts. Thanks to Elle who so patiently explained to my non-technical mind how to add this pic when I post comments!! I will continue my story with the boys tomorrow........wait until you hear what happened on our afternoon ALONE with "D" !!

The Background Revealed

2007-02-06T23:02:00.000-05:00

The boys and Wayne continued to play. He was bouncing a ball with them, and watching them play with some trucks, and airplanes, and was interacting with them. They were responding to him very well, especially considering that initially both boys were afraid of him. Little “A” was afraid because he was not used to seeing any men, and “D” was afraid because of his previous relationship with his father, and being beaten severely. It was good to see both of the boys feel comfortable with Wayne. While Wayne and the boys were playing, Ludmila, “D’s” caregiver from the boarding home, filled me in (through the translator) on his background. Apparently, the biological mother of the boys was very beautiful, and liked to go around with different men. The Father was not really sure he was the biological father of “D”, so when the Father became drunk, he would beat the boy. Once “D” remembered he was watching TV and his Father was drunk, lying on the couch. He called the boy over, beat him severely, and then told him to go back over and finish watching TV. “D” also said that in the middle of the night when he was sound asleep, he would be awakened by violent shaking. His Father would come in the room, grab him during his sleep and shake him for a while, screaming at him. Once, when he was alone with the Father and he was drunk, he began again beating the child unmercifully. The Father was drunk, and looked away for a minute, “D” seized the opportunity to run away…..he was able to grab his coat, but not his shoes….and he ran out of the apartment up the outside stairs (they lived on the lower floor). When the father did not see him outside, he went back into the apartment. “D” quietly came down the stairs and ran out into the snow….barefoot. Now in the interior of Siberia where he lived, it can get down to 80 below Fahrenheit. He ran into the village until he saw a light on. He ran up to the door and knocked, and a kind woman let him in. She put his feet into a pan of warm water for them to thaw. The next morning she called the parents, and the came with toys and took him back home (the Father was not drunk). “D” had to be about 4 years old; I am guessing….between 4 and 5. The Mother became pregnant with little A….and apparently had some severe health problems. She was hospitalized during almost the entire pregnancy and “D” stayed home with his father. The Father did not drink during this entire time while the Mother was in the hospital. I am guessing they were trying to get their act together. Soon after the baby was born, the drinking resumed, and both of them were drunk. Another terrible beating ensued and “D” escaped from the house, and caught a bus. He rode to the house of a lady he knew and she let him in. When she saw the horrible, beaten condition the boy was in, she immediately called the authorities. The authorities came out to her home, saw the boy, and immediately went to the home and took the baby, “A” out of the house, now only 2 months old. “D” never returned to the home. He was sent to the rehabilitation home for 1 year until the parental rights were terminated. He was then sent to the boarding school to begin first grade after his year in the Rehab home (waiting for the parents to be rehabilitated…..however, they were not). During the entire time in the rehab home, “D” did not see his parents (they did not come to visit). He said he got a package once, from the Father, and it contained “some sweets”. At the time of termination of parental rights, the parents can request visitation, if they would like to continue to see the children. The parents did not request visitation with the boys. Little baby “A”, being only 2 months old when he was removed from the home, was taken directly to the hospital where he remained for two more months. He was treated for dehydration and malnutrition. More on his health and condition later...... Two sweet boys with such an unfortunate set of circumstances…….no wonder the older boy was so afraid.

Playtime Together

2007-02-05T23:57:00.000-05:00

After picking up the little brother “A” from his groupa, we all walked down a long, dark corridor in the Baby Home to a room where we all could play together. It was a very large room with a few cabinets and shelves stocked with toys, and a piano. There was a long row of children’s chairs, hand-painted and shellacked in the Russian style. They were very beautiful, and there were probably between 40 to 50 chairs in the room. This is where they have their music classes. The room had a carpet on the wooden floor. This carpet was one of those carpets with “roads”, you know, with the printed roads, and houses, and green grass…..only it was HUGE…….about 20X60. There were some other musical instruments in the room, a xylophone, some drums, bongos, and old time accordion!! Wayne and “D” started to try to play that accordion……and I was ready to Polka!! One of the doctors of the Baby Home came in with little “A’s” records, and I asked her a few questions about his health. I got some vague answers, though, that I really was not totally satisfied with. For instance, “A” had been given a diagnosis of hypertension syndrome and encephalopathy (strange, but true). Both of these were neurological diagnoses, and the first one, we don’t even have such a thing for a child in the U.S. (See my link on Russian Medical Diagnosis for more info). Apparently, the Russian Neurologists are so worried that they may exclude a diagnosis, that they prefer blanket coverage!! In other words, it is better to give the child every problem in the book, and then look like a miracle worker when they no longer have it, than to be caught missing a diagnosis!! Sounds a bit like reverse medical malpractice, doesn’t it? Well, this doctor proceeded to tell me that after the baby received treatment with immune system boosters, and massage therapy, and a medication that increased the blood supply to the brain (I have never heard of such treatment, and neither has my Pediatrician or Family Practice Doctor!!) that by the age of 1 year, he was completely cured of the encephalopathy!! Hooray!! It is a Miracle!! I was still not real clear on the cause of the encephalopathy, but whatever the cause, now Little A. was cured!! During my conversation with the Doctor, Wayne and the boys were playing together. Wayne sat down on the floor with them. Little A, who we had been told had no attention span whatsoever, sat next to Wayne for at least 30 minutes, playing different musical instruments, as Wayne showed him how. Big brother “D” was handing little brother new instruments, and new toys, wanting to share everything he had with his little brother. Little “A” played so quietly and was very interested in each instrument or toy. He then got up and began to run around the room, laughing and playing with his big brother beside him. They were having a wonderful time playing together.

Return to the Baby Home

2007-02-04T23:07:00.000-05:00

The next morning we arrived at the Baby Home to visit with both of the boys. “D” had slept over at the orphanage for older children which was across town. He and Ludmila, his caregiver from the boarding school, had already arrived. They were standing outside in front of the Baby Home when we drove up. Wayne and I got out of the car and “D” came excitedly toward us, only, he was actually looking for our facilitators’ son, Ivan. Ivan (Ivana as “D” called him) had been our interpreter the first day we had met “D”, and since he was younger (in his early 20”s) “D” seemed to feel an attachment to him. So, when he realized it was Zoya who was with us, and not Ivana, he was a little disappointed. He kind of shrugged his shoulders, and then resigned himself to just spending time with us!! He walked over to us, and gave us both a little hug, even though to me it seemed to be half-hearted. How could it not be??? We all walked inside to see the little brother. We walked upstairs directly to his groupa and waited. We were in the room where the caregivers have their lockers, and hang their coats and shoes. We were waiting for little A. to be ready to join us and for the boys to play together. Suddenly the big brother “D” began speaking Russian quickly and in a very panicked voice. He was getting restless, and moving, and agitated. Wayne and I looked at Ludmila the caregiver with an inquiring look on our face, as if to say “What is wrong?”. Ludmila explained that “D” was saying “Please, please, I don’t want to be left in a shelter…..I don’t want to be left in a shelter”. Apparently, being back in an orphanage setting, (he is now living in a boarding school) brought back some very uncomfortable memories. He was afraid that we were just going to leave him there and now he would be living in a shelter. I told Ludmila, his boarding school caregiver, to tell him that he is not being left here. We are only here to see his brother and to play with him. We are all spending time together and getting to know one another. He seemed relieved at that explanation. “D” had actually seen his brother the day before, for the first time in almost 2 years. He and Ludmila came over for a visit to play with his little brother just prior to coming to meet us. They apparently had a nice time together. Zoya, our facilitator, and Ludmila both asked “D” how he found his brother yesterday (meaning….what condition…or what did you think of your brother). “D” matter-of-factly answered “Normal”. We laughed at his response. HA! How did you find him?? Normal, of course!! Just then, little “A” came toddling through the door, holding the hand of one of the caregivers. “D” smiles at him (we are smiling, too) and runs over and gives his baby brother a little hug. With smiles on all of our faces, we walk down the corridor to get to a large playroom where we can all spend time together, and the boys can play together.

America's Future Artist

2007-02-03T23:31:00.000-05:00

Here is the drawing "D" made while we were together. Didn’t he do a great job? That is a butterfly, a dog’s face, an airplane, a cool looking car, and some stacking toys. Of course, the house has a chimney with smoke coming out from it. I asked him to draw a flower (you can see it behind the car). He drew it with great detail. While he was drawing, our facilitator was reading (verbally translating) his school report, and medical and psychological evaluation. I was told that "D" was a well behaved child at the boarding school, a very good boy. He is polite, kind and honest. Even if he has done wrong and did not get caught, he comes forward to say he has done something wrong. He was described as a follower instead of a leader. He never picks a fight and doesn't fight with others. He is doing well in school, and reading after starting only four months ago. "D" was described as "creative", and that his drawings are not typical of other first graders........they are much more detailed. The psychological evaluation stated only that he was not confident in his own abilities and that he needed a lot of praise. It makes good sense that his self-esteem would be low and that he would thrive on praise. I am a big believer in positive reinforcement, and trying to focus on the positive aspects in a person. Hey.....who doesn't like praise?? I am all for that approach!! The medical history was not too bad, considering his past abuse. When he came to the boarding school he initially had a problem with enuresis (bed wetting), but that was now resolved. He also had a problem with iron deficiency anemia that is also now resolved. I am thinking it was probably diet related, as the parents obviously did not provide the proper diet ( or maybe much food at all). He also had cryptorchism from birth that was corrected surgically in January of 2006 (undescended testicle). I also tried to get a good look at his teeth (zoo-bee) to see if there were any huge cavities and things looked OK, but we shall see when he goes to the dentist. He has had one baby tooth pulled, for cavities, and his two permanent teeth in the front are just starting to come in. His current height and weight is on the 15th percentile for 8 year olds ( I brought my own charts!!) Now he appears to be in fairly good health and all we need to do is get him home, fatten him up a little, love him a lot, put his mind at ease, and pray for peace and trust to come to his heart. We'll continue the story of the visit tomorrow.

The Visit Continues

2007-02-02T23:01:00.000-05:00

After our successful experience of looking at the books and some reading with “D” we decided to get out some of the things we brought for him (now that he was no longer crying). We gave him a small lego car to build. “D” told us that he loved legos, and he loved to build with them. He also loved to draw and liked to be creative. We told him that we had a son, Remington, who also LOVED legos. In fact, I think we have so many legos, that we could probably build a guest room!! HA! Remmy also loves to draw! He finished building the little car, and then when on to coloring and drawing on some drawing paper. As he was drawing, Ludmila, the caregiver from the boarding school was talking to him in a soft, drawn out voice (it sounded like “Mother-eze”, if you know what that is). She said to him…”In America you can have a family…….and live with your brothers…….and have your own toys………and have a Mama…..and a Papa……and you will get your own box of crayons……and you will not have to share with all of the other children, they will belong to you. We then told him that we had pictures of our home, and of our dogs, and Remmy and Tavia, and would he like to see them? He said “Nyet” (No). Ludmilla said we should give him more time, and we will talk about it again tomorrow. We agreed. Then “D” said that he would like to see a picture of our car, though. Well!! Of course!! I did not have that, however. We got out a color book that had all of these pages that were 1). Find the matching picture, or 2.) Find the picture that is different, or 3). trace through the maze. I purchased this coloring book because I thought these were things we would be able to do together without knowing the language. It worked!! He got them right! He was even faster than I was!! I had to stop and think a minute in order to check his work, to make sure he made the right choice!! He is a very bright child! I was very pleased with his demonstration of prolonged concentration. Up until this time, he had been fearful that Ludmila would leave, and he would be alone with us and the facilitator. He clearly was feeling more at ease with us. We continued to play together on the floor, and Ludmila got up and quietly left……only for about 15 or 20 minutes, but non the less, it was a first step in “D” building trust with us. Ludmila returned shortly, and it was time for them to return to the local orphanage in town. Wayne and I both hugged “D” goodbye and told him “ ah ZAF-tra (until tomorrow).

The Older Boy Comes to Town

2007-02-01T23:16:00.000-05:00

We had been told by our adoption agency director that it would be impossible for us to travel to the boarding school of the older boy. There were no hotels or restaurants in that little village, so there would be no place for us to stay during our visit with him. In addition, she stated the drive to that remote area during this time of year could be “just disaster!!”. So we were expecting the boy and his caregiver to arrive in the town of Magadan later that afternoon. Our facilitator in the area called to say that we would be meeting the boy in a large visiting type room in the hotel, and that he and his caregiver, Ludmila, had arrived and were getting settled in at the orphanage in town for older children. We learned from our facilitator, Zoya, that both parents rights were terminated, and the boy had been harshly beaten by his father. She had spoken with the caregiver upon arrival to the city, and Ludmila remarked that “D” had asked her “Do these people beat their children?”. How utterly sad. It was determined that we would all meet at 2:00pm (dva che-SAH). The hour of meeting had arrived, and there was a knock on our hotel door. We had expected to see our facilitator, and were planning to leave our room to go to the larger area so that there would be space and more of an area to play. However, when we opened the door, we found Ludmila and “D”!! Now, they only speak Russian, and we are extremely feeble at communicating in Russian. But, somehow we managed to invite them in, and say it is very nice to meet you, how are you, etc. Neither Ludmila nor we knew where this supposed “visiting area” was, so we just quietly waited for our facilitator to arrive. It was only a few minutes before Zoya’s son arrived, and as we started to leave the room to go to the other area, the boy began to get very apprehensive and said he was afraid….and did not want to leave the room. He was afraid Ludmila was going to leave him alone with these strangers. We all decided maybe the best thing to do would be to stay in our motel room and visit there. We had two chairs, and the end of the bed to sit on, and there was a little room on the floor for playing and moving around. We were talking for a couple of minutes, when suddenly, “D” burst into tears……his caregiver, Ludmila was trying to talk to him, but he began sobbing and was speaking to her in Russian. He was inconsolable!! Ludmila finally related that “D” said when he looked at Wayne and myself, and thought of us as a “Mama” and “Papa”, that he was reminded of the last time he was with family, and he was severely beaten. Ludmila tried her best to settle him down, and he would not quit sobbing!! Finally I thought to myself, “ I must distract him somehow”. I pulled out this really cool book, that you all will find helpful, especially if you are adopting older children. It is called “My First Thousand Words in Russian”. On each page of pictures there is a little hidden duck. I opened the book and yelled “Guh-DEA OOT-ka?” (Where is the duck??). He suddenly became curious….and started looking at the pictures. When he found it, he pointed and said “Voht” (Here is). We went through a lot of the picture pages, where he concentrated intently, and found the duck on each page…..some pages harder than others. When he came to the end of the “duck” pages, there was a page with animals listed on them. He began reading the rest of the book. I then pulled out this storybook that I accidentally bought, that was written entirely in Russian, except for a small English synopsis at the end of the story. He started reading “Puss in Boots”, and quite well, I might add. Ludmila told us that he has only been reading for four months, too! Although he turned 8 years old last November, he is still in the 1st grade. Apparently when the children were taken away from the parents they were placed in a Rehabilitation Home. This is a home where children reside while the parents are being “rehabilitated” and are trying to get their act together, in order to keep custody of their child/children. “D” lived there for one year, and apparently there was no schooling there. When the parents were not rehabilitated, and their rights were terminated, he was sent to the boarding school in April 2006, and was placed in the first grade. He did rather well, but could not learn the entire curriculum by the time school was out at the end of May. So, when school resumed again in the fall, “D” was placed in the 1st grade again. Well, we finally we had to get the “Puss in Boots” story away from him, because he did not want to stop reading!! He was finally more at ease with us!! Continuing Part 2 tomorrow……

That Cute Little Guy !!!

2007-01-31T23:25:00.000-05:00

Check out these shoes!! Can you believe it?? Yes, that is my boy in the pink socks!! On the day we met him, he was wearing these adorable hot pink sandals, with hot pink butterflies on them!! I wish I had gotten a better picture, but you can sort of see them here from the side. Isn’t he just adorable?? As Wayne and I reflected on our visit to the Baby Home. we were both just thrilled!! We both commented that Little A. had exceeded our expectations. We were thrilled with his outstanding motor skills and coordination (you should see that kid kick a ball….he is first-rate!!). He had exceptional comprehension and his attention span was quite long. He seemed to have a pleasant personality and he was very well liked by all of his caregivers. Angelina, the Director of the caregivers stated that as busy as he was ( when he was running and sliding, laughing and playing), that behavior was only a very small part of what he was capable of!!! She said he could be quite precocious and get into everything!! I was actually somewhat relieved to hear of this, as I had visions of an inactive child, that sat around and could not concentrate….or the opposite: one that could not sit still and focus, and ran from one thing to the next, totally out of control. I had brought with me several different assessment tests to perform on the child to assess developmental level, risk of autistic type behaviors, hyperactivity, etc. As it turned out, I didn’t need them, and I had the reassurance that he was a normal, healthy baby!! Our in country facilitator informed us that the older brother, age 8, would be arriving in town later that afternoon. He attends a boarding school in the interior of Siberia, still within the Magadanskaya Oblast (Region), but it is a five to six hour drive, depending on the roads, weather, AND vehicle (you can imagine what I mean). Now we anxiously await his arrival and hope the visit with him in the afternoon will go as well as the visit we had with his younger brother this morning.

Sightseeing in the City

2007-01-30T23:47:00.000-05:00

Just after completing our visit with the little guy, our facilitator decided to take us into town to see some of the downtown area, and to look for a few souvenirs. We looked in a few shops and saw some interesting crafts. They have quite a few artifacts about some natives….like Inuit’s….I am not sure what they are called, but the ethnicity of the Alaskan Eskimo. It makes since that if there were this race in Alaska, that they would also live in Eastern Siberia, as many, many years ago, the lands were connected. Also, during the winter, the Bering Strait is frozen, and I have read some blogs of people who crossed the Bering Strait while it was frozen. I think that is awesome, but, I don’t know about you, but I think I am choosing a different goal in life!! Anyway, we saw several plaques and crafts about Russian-Eskimo type people……I shall have to do more research in this area as I know I am speaking quite ignorantly now!! There were also some beautifully crafted bowls, serving pieces, and tea sets. I saw several sets of Matroyskas, Russian nesting dolls, which I later purchased. I was actually looking for a pair of winter boots to wear while in Magadan. My Nike Shox about froze the bottoms of my feet right off!! I had heard that some boots made from felt, called “VA-linki” were very warm, yet inexpensive. So….off we trotted to the shoe store to look for these warm, felt boots. Well, those of you that know me…..the two words Susan and Shoe store in the same sentence spell trouble!! We arrived at the shoe store, and I was shown the Valinki. They were felt alright……and may I add, NOT very stylish!! Of course, they only cost about 12 rubles!! WOW!! That is less than 50 cents!! Sorry…..it was a great idea, but, I was not in the least attracted to those big, clunky, felt things. I looked around….and Man, oh, Man!! Such cute, CUTE boots did I see!! Now, the good thing in Russia is……the ONLY colors they have are…..brown or black!! ( I did see a Russian woman in Moscow wearing a white pair of boots, but everyone stared at her!!). So…..at least I did not need a pair in all kinds of colors!! HA!! Before Wayne could get me distracted and out of that store, I bought 4 pairs of boots!! They were very comfy and warm, too. I must say….much more comfortable that boots I have tried on in the U. S. I wonder why??? Maybe it has something to do with the temperature and WANTING to keep your boots on!! Sometimes there is method to our madness…….

The Meeting!!!

2007-01-29T21:37:00.000-05:00

The time had come to meet our youngest referral, little A. Wayne and I were sitting on the couch in the large, living area of his groupa. Besides a couch, there was a small table and some chairs (toddler size), an umbrella stroller with a doll (kookla) in it, a small plastic climbing gym with slide, and a couple of see-saw toys. We waited on the couch for A. to enter. The representative from the Guardianship department, Svetlana L. was sitting in a chair across from where we sat. She was observing us. Suddenly, I heard the caregivers speaking in Russian to little A. (I have learned some words and phrases, and it is easier to understand what is being said in Russian, than to speak it, at least for me…. as my mind does not seem to work that fast!!). The caregivers were saying to him, “Come in here, your Mama and Papa are here”. “Your Papa and Mama have come to see you.” “Come see your Mama and Papa!!”. We were so nervous waiting for him to come around the corner to where we were seated. As the voices got closer and closer, I was feeling more and more anxious, wondering what I would see with that first glimpse. Would he be normal? Would he look like his picture? (I hoped not…..he had some questionable characteristics in the picture, but then, it is hard to determine overall health status from a small picture). Would he be hyperactive and lack focus and concentration?? Just then, he walked around the corner and came to stand in front of us. He was still holding the care givers hand. She picked up his hand and started rubbing it on Wayne’s leg and said “A. etta tvoy Papa” (A. this is your Papa), and then the same with me, stroking my arm “ Etta tvai- YA Mama” (this is your Mama). The look on his face was one I will never forget. It was one of wonderment!! He looked almost as if to say “Papa?? Mama?? Where in the world have you been???” He looked adorable!! He was a little on the small side, but was well proportioned. He had such fair skin, and pink rosy cheeks, with blue eyes and medium blonde hair. I pulled him up in my lap and spoke with him. He looked intently into my eyes. I reached down into my bag and pulled out a couple of toys we had brought for him. One was a little blue elephant (sloan) with activity beads and such on it, and the other was a kitty puppet. As I started to squeak the sloan (elephant) his face puckered up as if he was going to cry!! I quickly put that to the side and tried the kitty puppet! It seems he was afraid of that, too! The children are very limited in what toys they are exposed to there in the orphanage. I think he just had never seen toys like that before. I reached into my bag again and pulled out several cardboard books, with pictures, colors, animals, etc. I also pulled out some of the snacks and juice (sok). He sat in my lap for over 30 minutes while we “read” stories. He loved looking at the books, and enjoyed pointing to all of the pictures. I then passed him over to Wayne’s lap. He took one look at Wayne and started to cry. His chief caretaker, Angelina, had entered the room by that point. She explained that the children in the Baby home never see any men, so most of them are afraid of men. We quickly distracted little A. with the books again, and immediately he was fine. I also pulled out a blanket we had brought for him to hold while we read. He allowed Wayne to hold him for the rest of the visit. I was shocked by his manner of concentration and focus on the books. He sat very still and paid very close attention. Angelina told me that he loved books and loved to be read to!! So much for the hyperactivity thing and not being able to sit still to concentrate!! Angelina then announced loudly to Svetlana of the Guardianship dept. that she had absolutely NO reservations about of as his parents, whatsoever. She said she could tell by all the thoughtful things we had brought him, along with our interaction with him that we would be very good parents for him. That made us feel really good that she said that in front of Svetlana. Angelina then called to little A. and had him get down from our laps. She said in Russian…”Let me show you what he can do”. She then proceeded to give him instructions of things to do, and he followed them all precisely!! She asked him to slide down the slide, run around the room, kick the ball, etc. She was calling to him, and he was laughing, and giggling and running away. He was really having fun!! She asked little A. to push the doll in the stroller, He went running around -the room with it and then slammed it into the wall! Then she said “ Di–tee kookla chai” (Give the doll some tea). He immediately ran over to the table, picked up a little cup and then ran back and then held the cup up to the kookla’s (doll’s) mouth, so she could drink!! I am thinking……WOW!! Angelina then asks him to be nice to the kookla, and he then starts stroking her hair and petting the doll!! Of course, Wayne is still a little bit in the dark, and not exactly understanding what is happening, as he does not understand Russian yet. I thought about what had just happened. I was SO impressed!! All of the concerns I had about his supposed “hyperactivity” and his “inability to concentrate and focus” had all disappeared, and now I was seeing him “in action” at full speed, and not only comprehending what was asked of him, but actually doing it!! I felt so relieved!! I had not even had the opportunity to visit with the doctors yet regarding his medical condition, but after seeing him and evaluating him in person, I knew he would be absolutely fine!! He is a perfectly normal little boy, who just had very unfortunate circumstances. He only has a few institutional delays…..and this we can handle!!

The Baby Home

2007-01-28T00:11:00.000-05:00

We arrived at the Baby Home, called the Magadan Specialized Children’s Home about midmorning on Friday (after finally reaching Magadan on Thursday evening…..remember we left on our trip on Monday a.m.). You remember “This is the song that never ends”……well, this was the trip that seemed to never end!! Finally we arrived! As you can see, it looks pretty awful on the outside. We are taken through the door and entry room (all buildings in Siberia have a very small entry area, that protects the inside of the building from the harshness of the cold outside, I can’t remember what you call it, but it is like a small wind breaking room) into the main hallway of the orphanage. We walk down a hall and go into the Chief Doctor’s office, a large room with a desk, a long conference table, and a sectional couch. We wait for her to discuss the health condition of little A. After waiting a few minutes, we discover that she is out of the building for a while, and we will be taken directly to see the child. We go upstairs to his groupa (group), but he is not there. He is down the hall with the other children in “Music Class”!! Isn’t that adorable? They have different classes for the babies and toddlers, that include music and other activities, and they have a schedule they follow, which I’ll post at a later time. We walk up some stairs up to the second floor. The stairs are made of cement, and have moderate size chips out of them, but they have a fresh coat of bright enamel on them, orange in the middle with blue stripes on the sides. It is very bright and fashionable, despite all the cracks and wear and tear that is present. We enter the door to the groupa and the first room is a small one with wall to wall lockers. All the caregivers in this groupa are assigned a locker, and there they hang their coats and all of them change their shoes, and wear clean slippers only inside the home. We take off our coats and shoes, and enter into the “living room” area (as they called it). I immediately recognized the pattern on the couch, as the one in the picture of little A. Of course, in the picture he was only 14 mos old, and now he is 24 mos. I will digress here for a minute and say a few things about our referral process, which is different than some other areas. We are given a picture of the child, birth date, and list of medical diagnoses (with NO elaboration or explanation) and the color of the child’s hair and eyes, and a description of the child’s personality (Little A. was described as a “fidget child” meaning they felt he was overly hyperactive) before we travel. We either accept to meet the child/children, or decline and are given another referral (with gender, age, etc. listed above). The official letter is sent to our e-mail from the MOE (Ministry of Education) in Russia. All referrals come from them, and not the individual adoption agencies. So, since we already had the formal letter (sent in Russian and also a translated copy), we did not need to meet with them upon arrival. However, during the first meeting with the child, a representative from the Guardianship Department is required to be present. This person observes your interaction with the child, and then testifies in court as to what they saw and how they interpreted your interaction with the child. Svetlana L. from the Guardianship Dept. had already arrived and was waiting for us in the living room area. We took off our shoes and went in and were introduced to Svetlana. We sat down on the couch and awaited the arrival of little A. Tomorrow……the meeting!!!

How is it Magadan?

2007-01-27T19:15:00.000-05:00

As I was commenting previously in wonderment, while in St. Louis at the Secretary of States Office, I met a young woman from Magadan, and explained we were adopting from that area!! She asked me how I ever got assigned to the area of Magadan. That is another miraculous story! When Wayne and I were first investigating adoption agencies and deciding on which one would be right for us, I read a story of a family that adopted from Magadan, Russia. When I read that, it was like something “stirred” inside of me. We knew we wanted to adopt from Russia, and I had heard only wonderful things about AIA, Alaska International Adoptions. So, I called the director of the agency, Olga, and told her we would like to use their agency, and that I wanted to be assigned to Magadan. She was very happy to have us join as clients, but was not very positive about going to Magadan. She stated that area was very limited and probably would not work for us. Olga said she would send us to a large area called Khabarovsk (ha-BAR-osk) yet still in Siberia with much more availability. I had already met several families who were in the process of adopting there, and although the children are beautiful, it is a more hostile area toward Americans that are adopting, and the waiting times were so much longer there. I explained to Olga that I was in a “two-year down time”, meaning, I am finishing up an educational program that requires some additional “on the job training” that will start in a couple of years. So this gave us a perfect time to bring another child into our family. Olga stated she understood, and therefore would send us to a new area just opening in our agency, the Moscow City area. I said that would be great and we went on to complete our paperwork. We contracted with the only Social Worker qualified to do a home study for international adoption. Our social worker had a reputation for completing a home study quickly…..usually within a month or less. We were thrilled about that, and were ready to get going. All the intrusive questions were answered and we had our portion turned in to her by mid June and the home visits were completed by July 8th. We anticipated a completion of the home study by the end of July, first week of August by the latest. Then the nightmare began!! The long and the short of it was the social worker went through a divorce, and her typist went through an illness……and the home study was finally completed October 28th!! Our social worker was a “freelance person” and was not associated with an agency, and that is where we started to fall in the cracks. We were having trouble getting an agency license, although she was affiliated with a business type agency and had a business license; the business she was employed with did not do home studies. At any rate, the Russian government had certain documentation standards, and essentially, we were up the creek without a paddle. Olga called us, and said she has been frantically thinking about what to do about our paperwork deficits. She stated she had no other choice other than to send us to a less strict region, and she was changing our area to Magadan. MAGADAN!! Well, that was where I felt we should be all along!! I was so happy!! Our paperwork was sent there, and translated into Russian and submitted to the Ministry of Education in Russia, and I believe they received it around the first week of December. Our boys became eligible to be placed on the data bank for adoption on December 7th, and we received a referral for them on December 8th!! We made plans to travel to meet the boys on January 8th………they were wonderful and exceeded our expectations!! And…….the rest is history!!! Or, at least, we hope the rest will be history!! So, you see, our frustrations in our delays were all a part of the plan because our boys were not eligible for adoption yet (children placed in an orphanage cannot be adopted for the first nine months they are there, to allow time for other family members to come forward and adopt them). We had to be held up for a while, until the timing is right. As I continually say, “We are providing the fuel, but God is driving”. THAT is how it came to be Mag-a-DAN!!

Wonders Never Cease!!

2007-01-27T11:11:00.000-05:00

I had such an interesting experience!! I mentioned the other day about being optimistic versus unrealistic in getting all my documentation completed and apostilled on Friday. I had originally planned to take the 3 hour drive to St. Louis on Friday afternoon after I had gotten our forms for our medical exams notarized by a physician friend of mine on Friday morning. He was going to accompany me to a bank for the notarizing because there was not a notary in his office. His office is also over an hour away from my home, too. Well, yesterday I had a meeting at the hospital, and I unexpectedly ran into this physician…..AND I had my medical paperwork with me!! We went to the hospital administration office and got everything notarized!! WeeHee!! That saved me a trip!! So yesterday, I was actually able to take off much earlier for the Secretary of State’s Office in St. Louis for the apostilling. When I arrived there, a young woman came in behind me and was speaking with an accent. Having just returned from Russia, I knew she HAD to be Russian. So…..I introduced myself and told her we were adopting from Russia, in Magadan. Her eyes opened so widely, and she repeated “Mag –a- DAN?” (Russian pronunciation)…….”I was born and raised there” she said! WOW!! She told me she left there 12 years ago and lives here now with her parents and her sister, although she and her sister are now married. I said “Yes, I was just in Magadan last week, would you like to see pictures??”!! We visited for quite a while, and then exchanged phone numbers. She was so shocked to find someone adopting from that area, as she has never even met another Russian from that area before!! I plan on introducing the boys to some of the Russian children she knows, and it will be so very nice for them to meet someone who has a connection the area of their birthplace!! Wonders Never Cease!!

Finally....... Pictures!!

2007-01-26T00:58:00.000-05:00

I was finally successful in posting pictures!! Apparently, one must click on the I AGREE to the terms of service box, and then one must ACTUALLY VIEW the terms of service!! HA!! Who knew??

NOW Check out Wayne passing the time away during our 15 hour Moscow layover !!

The top picture was taken the morning we were going to meet little A. That is his little "sloan" (elephant) I am holding. We are loaded up with toys, books, balls, and snacks consisting of goldfish crackers, teddy grahams, Gerber baby biter biscuits, and juice!! Oh, and of course we have lots of baby wipes!! The last time I used those baby biscuits, as I recall, they were VERY messy, but very yummy!! We are nervous, as the boy we are most concerned about is the younger one. The parental rights were terminated for these boys, so I have health concerns about drugs and alcohol. We are excited and afraid, both at the same time, but here we go!!

Tomorrow .................. The Baby Home...........stay tuned for the adventure!!

Focusing in on the Boys

2007-01-25T01:00:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow I shall begin the yarn describing our first meeting with the boys, when I am a little more coherent and have had some rest and sleep (Just finished a 13 hour shift!). I am also seeking some help tomorrow about why my pictures won't load onto the blog. I really have some great pics of Siberia (winter and all) and wanted to share those too......but learning about the boys and how our meetings went is probably the most important thing. So.....for the next few days, we will focus on that!!

What is in a Name??

2007-01-24T00:48:00.000-05:00

We have been working feverishly to complete our paperwork and application to the court. Only one hitch.....we must have a name to submit. We all seem to be a crossroads about this. We do not really like the name of our older boy and would like to give him a new one. But.....how do you tell a child that is eight years old that he is getting a new name?? I told Wayne we should just pick a name we like and tell the boy that is the American translation of his old name.....HA!! Wayne did not think that was fair (or honest)!! Any suggestions from some of you?? I apologize again for not posting the info on the boys yet, but it is coming. I have just been having to work so much to make up for the time off when we were in Russia, plus I am trying to finish up the last of some classes I have been taking!! If all goes well, we will have all of our paperwork completed, notarized and apostilled by Friday!!! That is......IF all goes well, and that includes a trip to the doctor on Friday morning and then a 3 hour drive to St. Louis for apostilling at the Secretary of State's office! Can you tell I am a REALLY optimistic person?? Optimistic or Unrealistic?? HA!! Sometimes they are the same!!

Unfortunate Delay

2007-01-22T02:00:00.000-05:00

I am having some technical difficulties trying to post some of our pictures on the blog. I thought I had it figured out, but I need to work out a couple of bugs. I'll keep working on it, but for now I apologize. Of course, part of my problem it that the area in which we live has NO high speed, so all I have for internet access is dial-up!! Can you believe it??? OK>.......Thank you for feeling sorry for me!!

A Funny thing happened while in Russia!!

2007-01-21T02:30:00.000-05:00

We noticed a few strange things right away upon arriving in Russia, or at least it was strange to us!! 1. While in the plane on approach, getting ready for our landing, as soon as the wheels of the plane touched down, a spontaneous round of applause broke out and cheers ensued!! Is it that joyful to be back in the "Motherland"? Or, were they actually relieved in their confidence of their pilot? 2. When we arrived in Moscow we heard several comments on the weather being very mild and warm with complaints that there was NO SNOW on the ground. The main complaint was that it was not COLD ENOUGH!! Can you imagine......NOT cold enough???? 3. There is no speed limit in the city of Moscow......I guess. Our driver was going 160 kilometers, which, at the time we were not sure how fast that was.......but we discovered it was about 105 miles per hour!! Mind you.....the streets were wet, and others were driving about 55 to 60 mph!! DO NOT attempt this travel on a full bladder!! You WILL be sorry! 4. Also....along the way on the highway (5 lane freeway) we passed at least 2 men pulled over on the shoulder and peeing over the guardrail!! 5. The Russian cleaning women at the airport just walk in and clean while the men are in the restroom and actively using it!! Wayne was so shocked to turn around and find a lady mopping just right behind him!! He said it happened twice!! 6. Every piece of pizza at the Domodedovo Airport had broccoli on it!! I mean, I really like broccoli......but it is weird on pizza! 7. While we were "stuck" at the Domodedovo Airport (our luggage piled up on a cart in front of us)....an older Russian lady came over and sat next to me, and started blabbing away. I told her "Yenya pan-youMY-o Parusky"....(I don't understand Russian) and I was looking at one of those Russian tabloids to pass the time away. Well, she grabbed the paper away from me, I guess thinking that if I can't understand Russian, then I certainly can't READ Russian (Kon-YESH-na nyet) - Certainly Not!! Well, I promptly took the paper back, explaining to her that I was looking at the pictures!!! HA!! She continued to ramble on for 10 or 15 minutes more, probably talking to her imaginary friend!! While we had our 15 hour wait at the airport, we did a lot of people watching for entertainment. Check out Wayne waiting and trying to pass the time away!!

Major Jet Lag!!

2007-01-18T02:01:00.000-05:00

Wow......I can't believe how tired I am. Doing that magical time travel in only 8 days is very hard on one's body! I finally fell asleep at 5am, and the alarm went off at 6:30am to get up and take the kids to school. Then, I had to work 12 hours from 9am to 9pm.....and I am beyond tired! I was like a zombie at work! It reminded me of all the times that I worked night shift and then had to attend my clinical classed during the day......sometimes going for around 50 -54 hours with only 4 to 6 hours sleep!! I sure am glad those days are over!! I have Thursday off, so I can catch up on my rest and hopefully adjust to "going back in time"!! Hang on......I will be posting pictures of our trip this weekend, and I'll fill you in on those two great kids we met, too!!

A Funny thing that happened while at the Airport!

2007-01-17T01:50:00.000-05:00

Two rather amusing things happened at the beginning our our travels. The first was while we were in St. Louis going through the security check to get to our gate to travel to New York ( to try to get the flight to Moscow....that we did not catch!!). At any rate, as I mentioned before, during our packing, we were afraid the bags would be too heavy ( I must be psychic!!!), so we added an additional bag and decided to take a carry-on, with spare clothes and emergencies and such, in case our baggage was lost. Wayne carried the "carry on" bag, and he was in front of me. As soon as his bag went through the X-ray machine......they requested to open and search it. Suddenly...... a large group of TSA agents swarmed on the bag and a large commotion began to take place!!! Wayne looked frantic and motioned me over. I ran over and looked in the bag......only to find all these huge bottles of lotions and creams we had purchased to give as presents for the orphanage caregivers......about 150 ounces of liquids and gels!! YIKES!! I said to my husband, "Honey, don't you remember when we went shopping for our own lotions and gels, soaps, etc, that could only be THREE ounces ......or less??" HA!! I guess in our haste of shuffling and redistributing the weight, we accidentally put the "illegal volume" in our carry-on!! SHEESH!! Once we explained to the TSA agents what the items were for, they were very understanding, and we had plenty of time to go back to the counter and check that bag, so we could still take the gifts to the orphanage workers. I was relieved we were allowed to continue on our journey.......and not go to jail!! The second funny thing was the next day, when we were actually going to be able to get on the Aeroflot flight to Moscow from New York. I was standing in line for check in, and the Aeroflot attendant at the counter began speaking all of this Russian to me!! When I began to speak to her in English, she immediately had a surprised look on her face and apologized to me saying she was sorry, but I looked Russian, and what was why she was speaking to me in Russian. Gee.......I wonder what gave it away???? My Cardinals Shirt or my Cardinals earrings????? !!!!! Seriously, I was also wearing a very heavy wool, long dress coat I had purchased 6 or 7 years ago in one of those trendy mail catalogs......oh, and when I got the coat and read the inside label?? It stated "Made in Russia"......imagine that! The fur on my wool hooded scarf contributed to the image as well, I am sure. I bought that fur scarf in New York as graduation present (for one of my numerous and many graduations that I seem to keep doing.....HA!!) I am personally one who believes in protecting animals, and I am against cruelty, but at the same time, being a medical person, I do believe some type of animal testing is tolerable, if cruelty is not involved and if it is for the benefit of saving human life. So, purchasing the fur was something I had to weigh carefully. It turned out that is was Canadian fox bred specifically to be used for such things. Secretly, I hoped my scarf was from a very small, starving fox that was euthanized due to poor health. But then again.......maybe those Russians are big on those World Series winning St. Louis Cardinals!! Yeah, right!!!

Doggies, Kitty, and Kids......OH MY!!

2007-01-17T01:11:00.000-05:00

We are finally home!! I feel like a new person after sleeping in my own bed!! And my back also thanks me (ya toe-zha) ....(me too!!). Kitty seemed to fair just fine on his own and didn't seem to suffer during our absence. He still had some food in his bowl, and.........since we live in a rural, country area, apparently Kitty had an extra snack while we were gone......as I found a little tiny mousehead in the living room!! UGH! Whenever Kitty finds and eats a mouse, he eats all of it except the head, (eyes, ears, and skull)....I guess it is too crunchy.......gross!! The doggies are Shetland Sheepdogs (Shelties) and both of them lost weight......poor things, but were SO HAPPY to be back home. We were happiest to see our sweet children and had such a wonderful time "catching up" on all that was missed last week. This evening we looked at pictures and videos we made of the boys. Tav and Rem have been working on the boys' room, and they had gotten out one of our old cribs (Tavia's actually) and scrubbed it clean, and them disassembled a daybed that was down stairs and brought it upstairs for the big boy. The boys will be sharing a room upstairs. Then they got out their old wooden train set and assembled it in the boys' room. They are both so excited to bring these new children into our family. I know we shall have to take the train set out, as I have heard that children living in orphanages should not have toys in their bedroom initially, as they will stay up all night and play with the toys, and not settle down and go to sleep...... it is not something they are used to. But......I could not dampen the enthusiasm that Tav and Rem both have. For now.....the toys and train set can stay in the room. What sweet giving children they are to make this sacrifice to share with two boys who have nothing!!!

There and Back Again!!

2007-01-16T00:00:00.000-05:00

We arrived in New York this morning, Monday January 15th, only to find the entire airport deserted. There had apparently been a terrible ice storm in the midwest, and most all flights from there were delayed or cancelled. We slept most of the way to the U.S. from Moscow. It is definitely easier traveling East to West, versus the other direction!! Nevertheless, we were very tired. We hurried to our next gate which actually was not departing for about 6 more hours, but we were anxious to get home! Of course, due to planes arriving late due to the bad weather, our plane to St. Louis was yet again delayed. Finally it was almost boarding time.......and they announced to the crowd that the flight was overbooked and would be asking for volunteers to give up their seats and fly out later, and if they did not have volunteers, they would just randomly bump some of the passengers. I looked at Wayne and said I was way too tired to volunteer for anything like that. I missed our kids, and I just wanted to get home. Then......I heard my name paged overhead.......NEVER a good sign!! We were told that our bags were too heavy, and we would have to stay overnight in New York, and get a flight out in the morning. What is it with the bags again?? We gave a lot of gifts to the caregivers at the orphanage......and still had to pay additional weight to get back to Moscow. That is because you are allowed 30 kilograms from Moscow to Magadan, but only 25 kilograms on the return flight. We had unloaded a lot of stuff we brought for the kids.....but it must have been the boots I bought that weighed so much .........OK....FOUR pairs of boots I bought. I am sorry, but Mother of Russian boys most (must) have Russian (said with a "rolling R") buts (boots) to wear!! HA!!So after explaining to us we would have a hotel voucher tonight (sounds familiar, doesn't it?) and get a new flight in the morning......they will call our name when it is all ready. A few minutes later, I am overhead paged again......expected to get the hotel voucher and new flight info.....they unexpectedly give us boarding passes and tell us to get one the plane!! Hooray!! One unexpected treat for us and our delay was being able to see Wayne's oldest daughter, who leaves in Nebraska, and was also re-routed unexpectedly to St. Louis due to weather problems. So when we arrived in St. Louis, we had a brief, pleasant rendezvous with her. Now.....only a 3 hour drive to the town in which we live.......and we will be sleeping in our own beds tonight!!

Finally We Arrive in Far East Siberia..... Magadan!!!

2007-01-15T01:49:00.000-05:00

What a wild and exhausting airplane ride this has been!! We finally arrived in Magadan on Thursday evening, fatigued beyond belief!! Listen, I have personally birthed 5 children, a couple of them were extremely difficult labors.....and compared to this process, redtape and travel, THAT was a piece of cake!! My hat goes off to all of you who have endured this very difficult process of foreign adoption. I have such incredible respect for you and your perseverance!! In my book, you are all Heroes!! But........just as in having a difficult labor and the pain that is experienced, one look at that precious little new life, and all is forgotten. So it is with this trip. We were able to meet the boys on Friday, January 12, "little A." in the morning, and "big D" in the afternoon, and as soon as we saw them and spent time with them, all of those feelings of trials and frustration quickly vanished. They are beautiful, sweet boys, both with very, very unfortunate life circumstances. More on the boys later...............

The plane we were able to purchase a fare on out of the Domodedevo Airport in Moscow was ancient. We were herded like cattle and it was a real "free-for-all". People were pushing and shoving, and yelling at one another trying to be the first to get their luggage checked. It acutally reminded me a lot of being in New York with the taxi drivers yelling at one another, only, I could not actually understand the cuss words since they were yelling in Russian. Once we were finally "coralled" on the plane, we took off. Wayne and I were in the business class, because those were the only 4 remaining seats on the entire plane (seats 6a and 6b). Of course, we are both idiots and thought the "0" in front of the six was actually an 8!! We are thinking "WOW...they sure have LONG planes in Russia for us to be in row 86!! HA! Well, after we made it to the back of the plane, and saw the last row was #28......we had to fight our way back to the front past all these hot, sweaty Russians in their fur hats and coats, and it was only around 35 to 40 degrees.....very warm for Moscow this time of year!! After great difficulty we arrived to our correct seats and it was time for take-off. Just as we are lifting off the ground, the wall (with the curtain you pull) that separates business -class from first-class suddenly fell down on the first row of passengers!! YIKES!! We were on some 1960's or 1970's plane with "ALPHA AIRLINES" written in English. It was such a nightmare, and we had these thoughts of horror flying over Siberia. We looked at each other wondering if we would ever really arrive in Magadan, and arrive safely. We trusted the Lord and did finally arrive!! Siberia is BEYOND cold!! The city of Magadan is actually on the Artic/Pacific Ocean, and it is totally frozen. I do not know how one thrives in this environment of such cold and little daylight. The sun rises around 10:00am and sets again by 3:45. It is dark at 4:30 pm. But yet, the people here seem content with their life and go about each day as if there is really no problem at all. It is amazing. We do apologize for being behind in our posts, as we had some e-mail difficulties in Magadan, plus the adapter we brought with us ( to use this brand new lap top purchased SPECIFICALLY for this trip!!) apparently was not useable for notebooks!! HA!! So much for the eleventy-seven movies we brought with us and paid overweight charges in our luggage ($2000 rubles)!! We have made the best of it however. Wayne and I spent a lot of time discussing the children, and making some very good observations about those who are less fortunate financially, or those who just lead a different life, and have a very different lifestyle. He and I are so blessed to have had parents that gave unconditionally to us, and who loved and cared for us. From my very youngest memories, I knew I was loved. Thanks, Mom. Unfortunately, it is not so for all in this world.

Out of the frying pan and into the Fire!!

2007-01-10T21:17:00.000-05:00

We finally arrived in Moscow only to find about 20 men standing outside holding up signs......only none of them had my name on it!! We stood and waited about an hour and one half for him while telling about 50 taxi drivers "Nyet Spaseeba". We tried to call him, but could not get a connection after he answered. Finally one of the taxi drivers got on his personal cell phone, dialed the number we gave him, spoke sound fast Russian works to him, and then hung up. Andre promtly showed after that. We made it to another airport (landed in Shermetevo and transfered to Domedero (I'm sure I spelled that wrong) and we were taken to a counter where Andre and the lady behind the counter spoke a lot of Russian, we paid for new tickets, and were given a flight to Magadan at 11pm tonight. I asked what airline that was. He stated it was not an airline, but the Ministry of Emergency Services, who will book you on a plane if you ever miss your flight. Who knew?? We have no idea what airline we are on, just a gate number, and we show up at that time and get on the plane. It is probably a plane full of supplies like poultry and maybe even sheep or something!! I don't care, just let me sit next to the tomatos and arrive safely in Magadan.

Russia or Bust!!!

2007-01-09T16:39:00.000-05:00

OK!! Huh-rah-SHOW!! A miracle occured and on an over-booked flight with Aeroflot, they accepted last night's tickets for the same fare!! Hooray!! We are on our way to Moscow!! This is great news, and so Andre, who is the Moscow man working with the agency, will meet us in the morning when we arrive. Olga said he will be holding up a sign with my name on it, only she wasn't sure if he knew how to spell my name correctly.......so just go with any man holding a sign, well, OK then!! How could this trip get anymore interesting???? We are extremely relieved to know we are continuing our travels instead of going home and post-poning the trip. The only catch now is that there are no available flights (showing on U.S. computers) until Saturday, and as we said before, that does not give us enough time with the boys. So, for sure we will make it to Moscow, and we have no idea as to when we shall arrive in Magadan, but God has a way and a plan. I am just providing the fuel for the vehicle, but He is doing the driving!! Olga, our agency director said we will just need to make accommodations for us to stay longer into next week, if that is what is required for us to see the boys. We will just have to return a few days later, and our jobs will just have to understand!! The kids will be disappointed as they are anxious for us to return home.....and sorry doggies...(Bella and Kaiser our Shetland Sheepdogs) will be sad to stay a few more days in the kennel!! So....we are off to Moscow, and then unknown from there!!

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles......

2007-01-08T23:47:00.000-05:00

OH YES!!! Just like John Candy in the movie.....and he could not get where he was going.......we are in the same boat!! Our plane in St. Louis was over 1 and 1/2 hours late taking off for New York, where we to board for Moscow. The pilot said "Not to Worry, for there is a tail wind, and we shall make up time along the way". Needless to say, that did NOT happen. When we finally arrived at the Aeroflot gate, after going outside the terminal to pick up our own luggage to have it rechecked by Aeroflot.....because American could not check our bags all the way through....and we landed clear on the other side of the terminal (southern term, there), they would not let us on the plane, as the flight was leaving in 35 minutes. Soooooo frustrating. Bottom line....fly Delta, as they do check the luggage with Aeroflot, and the terminals are right next to one another.....or other similar carrier that will at least be accommodating. Our big dilemma now it that the next Aeroflot flight is tommorow at this same time.......but the flights to Magadan, our remote area of Siberia are only twice a week! So....the next flight (since we will miss the one tomorrow) will arrive in Magadan on Saturday the 13th in the afternoon, and we are scheduled to depart on Sunday the 14th!! That is not enough time to spend with these boys and get to know them, and for them to feel comfortable with us!! I know there is a court date scheduled for the 15th, and then another family is to be scheduled right after them.......so I have a couple of phone calls in to our agency director, Olga.....and she is trying to coordinate with the regional facilitator, Zoya. Do we try to extend our visit into next week if it can be done so on the other end??? They will KILL Wayne and me for not showing up at work next week!! These people will FLIP if we don't come back to work!! We spent over two hours with American (since it was their screw-up that made us miss our flight) and they tried every way to get us to Moscow by tomorrow......but no go. I even lost it and started these shaking like sobs with huge crocodile tears streaming down my face. I am not usually like that at all (unless it is a Kodak commercial where the kids grow up)....but I guess being overly tired and hormonal put me over the edge. So the dilemma is to decide if we should travel on.....and hope for "stand-by openings" with Dommedevo, that is currently full right now, and also will not accept the ticket from Aeroflot, so we need to pay yet ANOTHER airfare to get to Magadan.....OR do we go home and and try again in another couple of weeks?? After all our Russian Visas are good until February 9th. We called our Red Star Travel person, and Olga, and they are trying to get some idea, as to whether we should keep traveling to Moscow and hope we can get into Magadan, or possibly regroup and try another time later this month before the visas expire. Hopefully we will get more information in the morning.

Packing , Packing and More Packing !!

2007-01-08T02:12:00.000-05:00

The last couple of days we have been packing and trying to get organized. We have read so much on chat boards from previous travelers to "pack light"......but how does one pack light for below zero weather?? We will need to dress in "layers" in order to keep warm, but all those layers are making the bags heavy!! HA! We had planned to just take one bag each to check, but as we kept filling them up with more and more stuff (for the children and the caregivers, along with our own many layers) we were sure they would be over the weight limit!! So we decided to add a couple of extra bags. Now we look as though we are moving there!! Our agency director told us that the gifts for the caregivers are really for the second trip, but that if we wanted to bring a few gifts for them this time that it would be a nice gesture. So......we are just bringing some lotions and soaps and pen and pencil sets. We have a few pencils for the boarding school and some toothbrushes for both the baby home and the boarding school. Wow....I cannot believe we are finally taking off for Russia in the morning!! For so long things were just at a standstill for us.....and now everything is at breakneck speed!!